Friday, April 18, 2008
Guess the Plot
1. Godzilla requires a miniature replica of Tokyo in the bedroom, and the Boogeyman is only interested in closet space. Georgia Gorgon, real estate agent in the city of Scaresville, must deal with some real terrors for clients.
2. The ad said Monster Apartments. They weren't kidding. But between the vampire downstairs, the witch across the hall, and the werewolf on the top floor, how will Shannon ever get any sleep?
3. All the stadiums and lecture halls have been named for corporate sponsors, so now what? A hunky real estate developer teams up with a buxom ad sales exec to bilk corporations out of millions.
4. When Mo moves into the Monster Apartments, he has no complaints--until he meets the other tenants: Cyclops, a dragon, a werewolf, and worst of all, a Minotaur who's more bully than bull. If Mo's going to find any peace, this monster's got to go . . . and that's no bull.
5. Where, oh where, do monsters live in the post-apocalyptic town of F'nashi? Real estate tycoon George Goodwin has the best luxury condos around. Problem is, the servants that come with the rentals keep disappearing.
6. When Giselle finds a spacious one-bedroom in Manhattan for $300 per month, she can't believe her luck. But what she thought to be rent control turns out more like a roach motel: you can move in, but you can't move out.
Dear (Agent or Editor),
The kids at school call him "Monster". Twelve-year-old Mo is the school bully -- and darn proud of it. That's before he finds himself homeless and forced to move to the only place available: a building called Monster Apartments.
At first it's all cool. Giant apartment, creepy forest scenery, nice girl across the street. Then Mo meets the tenants and the shock hits harder than a schoolyard fight: ["The shock hits harder than" should be followed by something that hits really hard. Hercules, The Hulk, Russell Crowe on steroids.] real monsters, every one. Cyclops, dragon, vampire, werewolf--and a Minotaur maniac with a taste for tormenting Mo. [The last time I lived in an apartment I had Mr. Macho Stud with his creaky bed on the other side of my bedroom, a Flamenco dancer above me, and a rock drummer below. And they had the nerve to complain about me, just because I was in my chain saw sculpting phase. I'd have welcomed a minotaur.]
Before you can spit, Mo goes from bully to bullied. The Minotaur quickly crushes everything Mo's got - his confidence, his safety, his friendship with the new girl. Like it or not, Mo's got to face that two monsters have to be stopped here: the bully in the building, and the bully inside himself. [But mainly the bully in the building.]
Monster Apartments is a coming-of-age novel in which the bully learns firsthand just how "monstrous" his bullying really is. Add a cast of unconventional, and often dysfunctional monsters, and Monster Apartments is a fun tale for middle-grade readers.
The manuscript is complete at 50,000 words. May I send you a whole or partial of Monster Apartments?
Thanks so much for your consideration, etc.
It sounds more like a funny picture book than a coming-of-age novel, but that's not a criticism. The query reads nicely.
I should think there's room to squeeze in a couple more sentences of information. Unlike younger kids, those old enough to read 50,000-word novels are old enough to wonder how a twelve-year-old kid becomes homeless and moves into an apartment building. For some reason it's easier to buy a Cyclops and vampire living in an apartment building than a solitary kid. If there's an explanation, you could throw that in at the beginning. Or you could include an example of the monsters being dysfunctional.