Why you don't get published.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Q & A 75 Where's the chicks?
I got my Evil Editor polo shirts over a month ago (I bought two figuring one would always be in the wash) but so far I've gotten zero action from the chicks. What gives?
Idiot. When they see you in the shirt they look at you, they look at the picture of Evil Editor on the shirt, they look at you again, and they think, I wonder how I get in touch with this Evil guy.
You should have bought the women's cap sleeve shirts and given them to the women you had in mind. Women love gifts. Also, if they're wearing the shirt, they can't see EE's picture, which improves your odds. And even if you strike out, it's not a total loss; you get to see them in their sexy shirts, which you purposely bought too small.
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14 comments:
I got my Evil Editor polo shirts over a month ago (I bought two...
When I first read this, I thought the poster was going to say that Evil's ample frame had spilled over onto a second shirt. Glad to see that Evil's strict diet is working. These days he only chews the Minions up, then he spits them right back out.
I knew I wasn't the only one who found EE hot! It's the lambchop whiskers, or perhaps those sexy specs.
It's the Benny Hill re-runs we watch together as foreplay.
I suggest that you move to Colorado and go on a pasta diet. Maybe start your own blog. Then the chicks will be lining up...
You are too funny EE.
Oh yeah. It's the 'burns.
Why would you wear a shirt of another dude, with expectation to hook up girls? Especially, when the dude's face is so... wickedly majestic?!
A better way, to find a suitable mate, is to cut EE's face out of the shirt, and glue it onto your face... It will work wonders, with both sexes!
(Word verification: brxhiv, which is what you'll get, if you hook up too many mates. Or so I've heard...)
EE: Maybe the shirt is just too sexy for the girls. The alluring power of the picture may be distracting them. I suggest going bare chested as an alternative chick drawing activity. And perhaps tune up your evil laugh.
I love this!! And I think I just fell a little more in love with EE just from his reply. Anyone who starts with "Idiot", oh yeah - that's hot. At least I hope it is, since I do that ohhhhhhh so often.
I also love my capped-sleeve EE shirt. Nothing like walking around all day with his face stretched across my... err...nevermind. Anyway. Heaven, really.
Manic Mom - you going to Atlanta? I forgot if you've said or not. My shirt is goin' with me!
feisty: Actually, the bare chested look might work with the EE tatoo... The guy might be hoping, that the girls are captivated by his chest, while they are only interested in EE, yet the tatoo will get the girls' attention. Isn't that what poor Idiot wanted, in the first place?
Wait a minute... you could get chicks, by wearing EE shirt? And I spent all that money on hens and roosters. Only neighter will lay any eggs... Maybe I should walk around the barnyard, wearing EE shirt! Wait a minute, brain storm! What if I walk around the farm, drinking coffee out of EE mug? Maybe the cows will make more milk... Except, I haven't got any cows.
Hold on a second... Idiot wasn't the guy's name! Abject appologies, for my obsene behaviour.
I would be all over a guy in an EE shirt. I mean, if I wasn't married.
I' buy the hubby one, but given my total failure so far to get him to dress up like Batman, I don't know if would go for being EE either.
Memo to: Evil Editor
re: Image on mugs and t-shirts
That's YOU? Oh, dear. I thought you were offering a shirt with the likeness of Benjamin Franklin. You've completely spoiled my plans for giving out shirts next year when the students learn about the Consitution. But since I bought 30, I will have to go ahead with my plans. I'll just tell them that if Ben Franklin were alive on the internet today, he might be an evil editor instead.
I'm sure somewhere out there, is a chick with a Benjamin Franklin fetish. Keep looking. Maybe she's out there, looking desperately through one of the many Colonial Porn Sites.
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