Thursday, December 13, 2007

Guess the Title 6 (Children's Books Edition)

Below are descriptions of twelve children's books. The descriptions were taken from Your job is to guess which title goes with each book. The fake titles were composed by Dave F., Mignon, Scott, Talpianna, Bill Highsmith and Evil Editor.

1. A "fanciful creature of undefined nature," it was also once the wisest, kindest, most fun-loving living thing in the world--until people stopped believing in it.

A Young Person's Guide to the Democratic Party
My Body, My Elf
The Last of the Really Great Whangdoodles
The Graveyard of the Imaginaries
The Sad little Bloggosaur
When Puffalumps Walked the Earth

2. Three children pore over an extraordinary manuscript forced on them by a passing hen: "The True Story of Harrowing Farm." The hen tells how little green men shoo her and her fellows from the cramped cages where they've been confined to lay eggs, uncomfortably, in public, then fit the cages to humans -- the species they prefer as food.

The Chicken Gave It to Me
Guess Who We're Having for Lunch
Green PETA People Eater
When the Clucking Ends
Three Men in a Kettle
The Hen Zen of Martian Farming

3. "Some cases start rough, some cases start easy. This one started with a dame. (That's what we private eyes call a girl.)" Fourth-grade gumshoe Chet Gecko searches for a missing chameleon named Billy.

How Chet Saved A Ton Of Money On His Car Insurance
The Case of the Reptile Dysfunction
The Geeky Gecko Gumshoe Caper
The Chameleon Wore Chartreuse
Gumshoe Lizard
Flight of the Iguana

4. Chester the cat, Harold the dog, and Howie the puppy set out to save the neighborhood vegetables from a vampire rabbit.

The Celery Stalks at Midnight
Full Vegetable Jacket
The Brave Little Onion
Revenge of Bunnicula
Carrot Dracula
The Vampireteen Rabbit

5. What if your Dad loved books, owned a bookstore, and even called his cherished volumes "my little bookies"? What if, while you're working in the store and hoping shoplifters will ease your burden, you spot a weird, pale stranger drinking a book--with a straw?

Return of The Blurb
Eat Your Words!
Thirst For Knowledge
The Ink Drinker
The Vampire's Book of Party Snacks
One Flew over the Book Coot's Nest

6. The author has a simple philosophy of the fable: "If you can't say something nice about someone, change the guy's name to Donkey or Squid." After all, the alleged Aesop did it.

Animals Are People Too
Squids Will Be Squids
An Ill Wind Blows No Nose
Christopher Hitchens's Book of Nasty People
In Case You Were Wondering, the Donkey is George Bush
Moral Minority

7. Two abandoned kittens encounter mishaps on all sides when they are adopted by a human family.

Cat Scratch Fever
Kitties In The White House: How Two Kittens Started the Iraq War
Snot Stew
Fur from Home
The Fortunate Felines' Fantastic, Fateful Adventure
Snot Stew? What's that got to do with Kittens?

8. Fourth-grader Albert has always been a little afraid of the Pine Manor Nursing Home, which he passes on the way home from school; the residents wave at him, but he just can't relax until he's well past it.

Old People Were Human Once Too
Albert Weinstein and the Case of the Agin' Cajun
Heaven Can't Wait
Evergreen and Ever Dead
Mannequin Manor
Old People, Frogs and Albert

9. The sibling rivalry between twelve-year-old Megin and her older brother Greg intensifies after she ruins his science project and he retaliates by throwing her favorite hockey stick into the pond.

Things to Do in Canada When Your Brother is a Dork
Blood Is Thicker--When Spilled
Pucks 'n' Ducks
Siblings from H-e-Double Hockey Stick
Who Put That Hair in My Toothbrush?
That Does it: I'm Sending in My Goons

10. In this Edgar Award winner set in medieval times, Anora chooses to marry the obnoxious but wealthy Farold instead of Selwyn, thus making Selwyn the chief suspect when Farold is found murdered.

The Donjon Murder
Death of a Big-Cheese Burgher
Twelve Angry Wenches
Never Trust a Dead Man
Stop, Fief!
Murder on Michaelmas

11. Shamelessly exploiting the intelligence, honesty, and guileless wit of the nation's youth (and apparently having a heck of a time doing it), the author asked over 100 kids the same question: "What do you think would make our world a more perfect place to be?"

No more Homework!
The Kid's Guide to Self-Delusion
Undoing the Damage Grown-Ups Do
Lima Beans Would be Illegal
Have Your Mom Buy You This Book and Make Me Rich
Kids Say the *#!$%-est Things

12. The author appeals to the gross-out side of kids in this exploration of edible grub (larvae and otherwise) around the world, past and present, and it's more laughs than a barrel of monkey brains (the one delicacy he missed).

It's Disgusting and We Ate It!
The Big Book of Yuck!
GrassWhoppers and McCockroaches
Grosstronomy for Kids
Surely You're Not Going to Stick That in Your Mouth!
Bugmeister's Insectivorously Delicious Diet

Answers below

The real book titles are:

The Last of the Really Great Whangdoodles
The Chicken Gave It to Me
The Chameleon Wore Chartreuse
The Celery Stalks at Midnight
The Ink Drinker
Squids Will Be Squids
Snot Stew
Old People, Frogs and Albert
Who Put That Hair in My Toothbrush?
Never Trust a Dead Man
Lima Beans Would be Illegal
It's Disgusting and We Ate It!


Ello - Ellen Oh said...

OK that was fun to read but I have to admit I didn't know any of these titles.

Robin S. said...

I hadn't heard of them either.

My favorite title is the celery-based title. Celery stalk double-entendre. A title after my own heart.

web said...

I knew four of them - go me.

Dave Fragments said...

I got none right. Very good titles.

I laughed aloud at "The Celery Stalks at Midnight." It's such a great title.

Anonymous said...

"The Celery Stalks at Midnight" (sequel to "Bunnicula") is also a very funny book. It's okay to read it even if you don't have a kid.

talpianna said...

I've actually read Never Trust a Dead Man. I like Vivian Vande Velde's books.

Word verification: lojadz A variation on the LoJack in which the car thief is pursued by a Viking who hits him with a primitive hand tool

pacatrue said...

Stop, fief, is thucking brilliant.