Why you don't get published.
Is it possible that the bullet goes inone ear and out the other without doing harm?
Squirrels with machine guns! Great fun. Good idea. The slushpile of absurdity!This reminds me of the old joke about the man who is standing relieving himself when a midget grabs his testicles and jumps up on the side of the toilet (or trough) and yells: "Give me your money or I jump!" That's equally as absurd. LOLROFLMAO... giggle
Heh Heh Heh! Where is the Mole Gang when you need it?ME
Man, I need to open these in another screen first. The beret makes the whole scene. Brilliant.It does raise three very interesting questions:1. Where did EE get all of that money?2. What are the squirrels planning on doing with that much money?and 3. Where did they get the awesome mini-machine gun?
Is that buffy squirrel? :-)
Good grief, are we stuck on squirrels, now? Loved the squirrel in the beret, though.
"Cartoons by Committee" could be a whole new feature for you, EE!
1. Nigeria.2. Sqrl-land3. ACME
Sounds like EE doth protest too much... Heh.
Thanks, Buffy.Don't worry, Robin. Actually, read Brenda's comment on EE's going away post and worry a lot.
Right - I didn't provide the squirrels; I'm getting credit for somebody else's work there.The one I provided wasn't just squirrels climbing a tree, they were, uh, getting friendly. That was kind of supposed to be the joke -- squirrels fucking...
Oh? A going away post? Where?OK- dammit. I'm going to look.P.S. I'm not cleaning up my language.
Whoops, meant the writing exercise post where he told us he was leaving.And that's okay, Robin, I'm a big girl ; )
Hey, Kiersten, thanks for the heads up.I just found it. My question is - oh, never mind. I just typed a load of nasty but (I thought) funny stuff, and changed my mind.
For a second there I was scared of a Miss Snark-like exit. But then I remembered that EE is just going away for the weekend.
Sorry Freddie, didn't mean to cause a scare ; )And Robin, what grace. I'm sure EE finds that attractive...
I'm sure Buffy is a stylish enough squirrel to wear a beret.
I agree, McK. If Buffy was in the pictures, that would be a whole 'nother matter.Is that you, Buff, in the beret?P.S. I like ril's original concept...
Lyle (I'm calling you Lyle because you never picked a name and typing the R. each time with seems too damn formal)- chill with that getting rid of you stuff.You fit right in here. Look around.P.S. I'm good with your 'fucking' motion. No - that's not a play on words. Yes- I can see how it could be one.As long as Buffy can be the main squirrel, I second your squirrel motion- now that I've had time to get used to it.I don't handle change well here.EE, have a great trip.
What will they do with the money?Nothing.They'll just squirrel it away somewhere...And the moles are off trying to figure out how to dodge Homeland Security and get on the airplane for the new writing exercise.
Flippin' squirrels.Neener neener.
Talpianna, you make me laugh.When you get around to it, please come on my blog and give the etymology of the word brazier.And Robin, I think it's more fun to call him Arlyle. Did I traumatize you when I popped up and started commenting like a madwoman?
OK, gotta say first that I'm not a prude. In fact, one of my WIPs keeps bouncing back and forth between spicy and erotic romance as I try to figure out what type of book it is. But I'm not a big fan of gratuitous cussing, grat sex and bathroom humor. The occasional riff, OK. But the atmosphere around here is kinda degenerating a bit -- IMO only. Going a direction I don't care to go so much (although I've slipped once or twice here myself). And that's OK. I'm just a visitor and I completely honor house rules. So I'll just be ignoring what I consider the earthier stuff and seeing you guys in the comment section of some of the cleaner posts. (God forbid someone else introduces an unfortunate typo in an otherwise "nice" little YA query.)Till then,A big girl who would never, ever censor, but who does know where the off switch on the remote is. And who doesn't care if you throw tomatoes at her because she knows where the soap is, too.
I like you, Phoenix ; )
I strive to choose the continuations and captions that demonstrate wit. Occasionally the wittiest one might be offensive to some, but cursing in itself isn't witty. And those occasions when a curse is appropriate ("Those darn squirrels" doesn't cut it when you've been locked in a 2-foot square cage) are less funny if cursing is being used frequently. Nothing's funny if it's used over and over and over (with the exception of Uranus jokes).
The debate crackles on, like a squirrel's tail hooked up to a van der Graaf generator...
True, the word loses its shock value, which is really all it has going for it. And while there are frequently, uh, salty? captions, they are mixed with ones that manage to be funny and clean. So no one is faulting you, EE. It's not your fault if the potty mouths are funnier lately ; )What an interesting discussion. This is part of the reason I don't think I can ever write for adults--I couldn't write convincing dialogue because my characters, when faced with surprising or painful things, would never swear. Which, let's face it, isn't normal.Ah, the glories of middle grade. Sure, most kids swear, but we can pretend like they don't.
I'm off from work today.This discussion is amazing - not altogether in a good way.Here are some facts:Saying fuck a lot doesn't make you a person who is good or bad. It makes you a person who says fuck a lot.You can be a religious person and go to church and be a good person.You can be a religious person and go to church and be a cruel, self-righteous and disgusting human being. History is full of them. I shouldn't have to explain, and I'm not going to.Saying fuck too much gets old to listeners. Saying a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush means nothing to some people and a lot to others -depends on experiences.We are all adults - at least chronologically. Why doens't everyone here simply what they say in the way they wish to say it - and let's get on with it.This whole discussion is getting ridiculous.EE, are you traveling soon?
I have a few hours, but I have to get the weredingos to their vacation spa.
Well, have fun. We'll miss you.Bring us back some stories, please.
There are grats around here having sex? Little buggers.
I've left you 2 ads, 6 slightly inferior cartoons and 9 writing exercise results. (The latter will appear Sunday between 8 and 8:30 AM.) You won't even know I'm gone.
Consider me defiled then.I'm with Phoenix.Gets bloody boring after while.As one little snot said in "Days of Hope and Glory" - "fuck"is a powerful word.It shouldn't be wasted.
Robin, I really hope you didn't get the wrong idea.Yes, I don't swear--never have, never will. It's a personal choice. Does it bother me when other people swear? Around my kids, yes. But since neither one of them can read, we're okay.Do I think people who swear are "bad"? Nope. I think people who swear with the specific intention of hurting/offending others are annoying, but that's about it. After all, Robin, you were my first Minion friend ; ) Say what you want how you want. We're writers; isn't that the point?And EE, of course we will. We miss you already.
"fuck"is a powerful word.It shouldn't be wasted.A search of this blog reveals that the word has appeared in 9 Face-Lifts (out of 529). It's appeared in about 30 new beginnings, but probably written by 30 different people. And about 30 writing exercises, again by at least 20 different people. Which makes this the cleanest humor blog currently online.
What's with writers' blogs bailing on me just when I get in the groove of lurking? Bastards....
I'll never forgive EE for censoring my list of words. Yes, I know you remember the one.;-)Last year I had a discussion with a critique partner about using a curse word in my middle grade. The main character was ten. He said "Sure, put it in. All ten year olds cuss." I said, "Mine don't."Next day, I had to take my oldest (then 9) to the doctor, and in the waiting room, talking to his *younger* brother, he said, "Where the hell is the damn doctor?"I pretended they didn't belong to me.Can I just say I love the British word "shite." It doesn't even sound like a cuss word.
EE, we will miss you! You might be setting up posts but we'll know you're not really there. And you won't be in the comments.I hope you have fun and that the weredingoes enjoy their spa.I have lots of comments I'm dying to make on the use of strong language but I'm saving them for my blog. I haven't forgotten who is in charge here!Don't forget to bring us back some photos; I still haven't forgotten the denim-clad knee. I'll try not to swoon but I can't speak for Robin.
How come nobody gets upset when people overuse exclamation marks? That's way more offensive.
EE - I'll know you're gone.But I'm glad you're going - I love to go - the feeling of leaving is a wonderful thing - as long as you're leaving because you chose to. And since it sounds like that's the case with you, I'm glad you're going.
Robin--sent you an e-mail. Please reply ASAP.
I thought "shite" was German (technically speaking "scheit", methinks)
Well, Matt- glad you stopped lurking and started talking, or writing, or commenting. Whatever!
How come nobody gets upset when people overuse exclamation marks? That's way more offensive.And also, apostrophe abuse.- freddie
Wait, what!!!!! You guy's dont like it when people use to many exclamation marks?!?! Thats so funny!!!!
In reference to the language issue -- if our novel makes copious use of f-words and s-words and so forth, is that something that should be mentioned in the query?
Only if you're submitting inspirational or children's books. It'll save the editor time.
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