Thursday, January 18, 2007
Guess the Plot
1. An intern is in deep trouble when she is entrusted with the one-of-a-kind master tapes from original Nirvana songs, and her roommate's guinea pigs chew them to shreds.
2. When Teresa dies, God gives her a chance to escape limbo by doing good deeds. Her ghost befriends a nerd who needs her help getting a girl, but it turns out he did have a girlfriend once--and she's a ghost hunter!
3. Jazz trumpeter Jonesy Day plays his heart out at night at the only job he can get, a joint on the Bayou where he meets a pole dancer, whose stage name is Nirvana. Jonesy is hoping all his lipwork is going to pay off at last.
4. The celestial beings who have achieved enlightenment rethink their position on the sacredness of all life when an infestation of rodents makes living in Nirvana less than heavenly.
5. Detective Jon Louis Bretonne finds 17-year-old Kendall White in a French Quarter back alley, dead. The only clue is the sticky green froth at his mouth that means he'd been nibbling nirvana, the latest drug on the teen scene. Can Jon Louis work his way through hell to find out whose been peddling heaven?
6. In this alternative history novel, Kurt Cobain is forced to run for his life when his buzzed bandmates get a case of cannibalistic munchies after a concert.
Dear Mr. Agent,
I'm querying your agency regarding my novel, Nibbling Nirvana, a YA paranormal chick lit of approximately 45k words.
When flaky, materialistic 16-year-old Teresa Jones kicks the bucket by choking on a pork sandwich, God gives her a chance to work her way out of limbo by performing good deeds. She befriends Brandon White, a quiet video game nerd in her school who can actually see and hear her, [It would be hard to do good deeds if people can't see or hear you. Is she non-corporeal, like a wisp of air? In which case she wouldn't be able to push a child out of the way of an oncoming truck? Or is she more like a mute invisible man? In which case when she takes an old lady's hand to help her across the street, the woman will freak out . . . and run in front of an oncoming truck.] and they strike a bargain: he'll help her fulfill her mission, while she'll teach him how to woo her pretty and popular best friend. [Does God know about this arrangement? Because Teresa seems like just the type to let Brandon do all the good deeds, in which case God's going to be pissed.]
However, a clueless ghost hunter (who just so happens to be Brandon's ex) [If Brandon has an ex, it would seem he managed to successfully woo at least one girl. I mean, what video game nerd has an ex? And if he does, why does he need lessons?] will do whatever it takes to make Teresa cross over to the other side. [Which is what?] Suddenly, Brandon's juggling more girls than he can handle, while Teresa's dealing with regret of things left undone. [Mainly, she regrets that she never got to finish that delicious pork sandwich.] And both must face an insurmountable problem: falling in love with each other.
Mr. Agent, I have a Master's degree in English and a Bachelor's degree in English, Creative Writing. I am a principal manuscript editor for a legal publishing company, and also freelance edit and teach self-editing workshops. I am a member of RWA, as well as the chick lit chapter.
I would be delighted to send you Nibbling Nirvana. Please let me know if you have any questions. I look forward to hearing from you and thank you for your time.
Can the ghost hunter see or hear Teresa? Is there an explanation for why Brandon can see her?
Why is Brandon juggling so many girls? What happened to wooing Teresa's popular friend? What is it that has so many girls suddenly interested in this quiet video game nerd?
When Brandon sees Teresa, is she naked? Or does she have on invisible clothes?
Is God an actual character who tells Teresa her mission?
This is fairly brief, so you have room to address a couple of EE's questions and comments.