Why you don't get published.
Ha! The caption goes so well with the eyes.
Unchosen captions:You can feed me all the spoonfuls of sugar you want, Mary, it won't make your story any more plausible.--writtenwyrddNow, class, for your Analogy for Idiots course final, you need to explain why reading the slush is like going to the dentist. Bonus points for using the phrase, "spit or swallow." --writtenwyrddAnd you thought I was kidding when I said I'd rather get a root canal than read slush!--?Man, you look JUST like John Gri-- Oh, shit. --anon.Oh, rinse and SPIT. Sorry, my bad. --anon.You queried me? Ah, remind me, what did I, uh, say...? --anonStrange, I wasn't wearing a suit when he put me to sleep.... --MatthewI'd do anything to get out of reading the slush pile. --PacatrueNot as bad a the slush pile yet.--?"The Boys from Brazil" fan fic? That's an interesting hobby... --anon.Slush... oral surgery... what's the difference? They're both excrutiating and require a thorough rinse and spit with a good disinfectant afterwards.--Mother (Re)producesUntie me you fiend! No matter how much you torture me I still won't publish The Adventures of Tommy Toothbrush in Stinky Mouth Land! --Mother (Re)producesLast time I dated a fetishist, it was the shoes that got to me... --WhirlochreBut there's no writers in there for me to spit on! --Suzan Harden
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