The object was to improve upon the simile ". . . spilling tears like an annoying drippy faucet." Let's hope the author chooses one of these suggestions, any of which would be a vast improvement:
Spilling tears . . .
like a crocodile watching Old Yeller.
like Evil Editor reading a pathetic query.
like a prep cook chopping onions.
like Paula Abdul off her medication.
like Ruthless Vigilante Sorcerers spill blood.
like the fountain of bitch.
like sweat from the armpits of Meat Loaf.
like a Chinese Water Torture device.
like Dick Vermeil.
A good analogy seemed elusive to the following writer:
In those ten years, his dream of taking up his famous father’s profession [printmaster] has proved as elusive as the mysterious forest people of the Mistlands.
We need something more obviously elusive than mysterious forest people of the Mistlands, who, after all, are easily found in the forests of the Mistlands. As usual, suggestions will be collected, and the better ones posted together.