Friday, June 01, 2012

Amusing Excerpt 7

Actual (or not) amusing (or not) excerpts from (or not from) minions' WIPs. If you have constructive criticism or unadulterated praise, feel free to comment.

 Setup: New York; our young heroine's first visit to the fabled city.

Marcy stood outside the door, taking deep breaths and trying to knock. Somehow, her arm didn’t want to obey. Man up, she thought. It’s not like he’ll eat you. She banged on the door and then fled before anyone could answer.

On the sidewalk, she watched the roaring traffic forlornly. Everything seemed so fast, so bright. Impersonal crowds rushed by. One man glanced at her, where she huddled against the building, and looked faintly startled when she smiled shyly at him. Oh yeah. They don’t do that up north.

Marcy wandered to the bookstore window next door and looked in. A copy of Beatrix Potter’s stories sat atop one stack, with a rabbit and a mouse pictured on the cover. A mouse. A country mouse. That’s what I am. Running back to the small town for fear of cats. Marcy set her teeth. I’m not running.

She marched back to the other building, up the stairs, and rapped on the door before her willpower could ooze away. Nothing happened. After a minute, she knocked again. It creaked open slowly. And there he was. Just as she had imagined he would look. The Evil Editor, blinking at her quizzically.

“Hi, I’m Marcy King, I’m a huge fan of your blog, and you always seem so patient, I just wanted a little advice from you in person and I happened to be in New York, this was a bad idea wasn’t it, oh gee I’m stupid, I think I’m going to be sick.”

And then she saw it. The gentle side of the Evil Editor. “I didn’t finish my danish yesterday. Would that help?”

--Rachel Roy


none said...

Heh, I rather like this one. Could probably be worked up into something good.

Dave Fragments said...

That's not eh New York City that I know and love (well not in a completely sexual way but a totally non-sexual way) with the gutters slick with dog poo and the strangely dressed women leaning around at night or the stoops filled with homeless.

Nope, last time I was there I was at the Opera.

Rachel6 said...

Haha, thanks, y'all. This is actually what happens when I am vaguely bored and see a "write what you please" on EE's blog. I think I owe EE an apology...

And Dave, New York is still on the bucket list.