Tuesday, February 28, 2012

New Beginning 929

Buddy and Vivienne were always putting bruises on each other; I can remember Vivienne with bruises up and down her arms and rope burns across her back and I remember Buddy with bruises and brush burns all over him and a grin on his face saying they'd gotten something just right and Viv was going to use it in her next match.

* * *

What the--? I read it again. Still I couldn't fathom the full meaning of what it said. Yet, what surprised me was not so much the words and what they might imply, but rather that it had fit inside the fortune cookie at all.

Opening: D Jason Cooper.....Continuation: Anon.


AlaskaRavenclaw said...

Did we ask?

Evil Editor said...

Unchosen continuations:

Her next match was with Kirstie Alley. Kirstie out gunned Viv by about a hundred pounds but the latest reality show, Warrior Women Who Mean Business could jump start Viv's Ninja franchise. These days Viv was all about leverage (financial and defense) and showing Kirstie what was what due to the beating Kirstie gave her in primary school years back. It was payback time and it was gonna get ugly.

Viv horked. Yup, this broad was going down on national tv. Right after she mashed Tonya Harding into the canvas. Batter up.

--Wilkins MacQueen

And I have to admit, this "quixotry" was a brilliant play and fully justified their excitement, but I preferred a quiet read and was still inclined to leave the Extreme Scrabble to the experts.


Those darn Dobies. Viv and Buddy, what a pair. One night, I regret it to this day,I didn't lock them in the house. How was I to know it was the Werewolf Revival? Vi's arms, I mean legs, but darn it she used them as arms,turned really hairy and big. Buddy went bush and ran howling into the woods after some Yeti or something.

Buddy won and I was arrested trying to bury the stinking Yeti because the Save the Yeti Team from California (don't they have day jobs?) caught me cold via satellite. Viv and Buddy are at the SPCA and I'm trying to make bail. A piece of advice, don't adopt either one. You'll be very, very sorry.

--Wilkins MacQueen

Dave Fragments said...

This sounds like some shorthand for a MMA couple working out new gimmicks for the fight gang. Think MTV's "Caged"...

Or maybe kinky mountain climbers having rough sex? like - I want to climb your mountains of the moon and scale the pinnacle of love... oh that's dreadful (roll your eyes now). It would make a good comedy.

Please flesh this out with bit more than it has. The next paragraph might explain it all and nothing needs changed but right now, its needs beefed up.

Rashad Pharaon said...

That is one loooong sentence!

none said...

We've seen a lot of openings from this author but this is the first one that's made me want to read on.

Loooong sentence? Only to the Twitter generation! lol

Khazar-khum said...

For some reason, I pictured this in a retirement home.

Rashad Pharaon said...

lol Buffy. Don't be surprised if Twitter reduces it's word count on tweets.

Where's the rest of this? I can't just critique one sentence...

Evil Editor said...

One-sentence openings should be sent to Hannah Rogers, but this one was too long to fit into a tweeted reply.

none said...

I think it's an intriguing first sentence. Does it have a friend?