Face-Lift 343

Guess the Plot

Wherever You Are

1. A simple game of hide-and-seek turns deadly, and it's every player for himself. When a trail of blood leads to a playmate's hiding place, the kids realize that this isn't a game any more. Come out, come out . . .

2. Octopus McGee searches paintings in the Louvre for clues that will help him unravel the hidden meaning of the last message from Mae Wong: Wherever you are, there goes an idiot. What can it mean?

3. The literary agent left and took her yappy poodle with her, but Minnie refuses to let go. She's headed for New York, to wander Eighth Avenue and West 35th. She'll find you, Miss Snark . . . Wherever You Are.

4. The elusive Mrs. Calabash, after a lifetime spent avoiding the limelight, finally turns up running a diner in Scranton.

5. Actress Laura James begins to fear for her safety when she receives a series of notes that say, "I will find you, wherever you are." Refusing to be alone, she hires two bodyguards . . . both of whom fall in love with her.

6. Pirates of the Caribbean meets Somewhere in Time, as Juliana, who's been searching for her boyfriend Zach ever since he vanished fifteen years earlier, time-travels back to the 18th century . . . and onto the burning pirate ship Zach is now captaining.



Original Version

Dear Agent,

When his love from another century reenters Morgan's life, the ex-slave and ex-pirate must learn to overcome his past, and fight a deadly enemy, to have a second chance at love.

Wherever You Are is a 100,000 word time-travel romance that encapsulates all the swash-buckling adventure people have come to love in the popular Pirates of the Caribbean movies, with the added benefit of a deeply emotional love story between two people scarred and hardened by life's choices. [I'm guessing "encapsulates" isn't the word you were looking for. I'd lose "benefit" as well.]

When Juliana MacKenzie’s boyfriend disappeared, the police ruled him a runaway. Never convinced Zach would willingly leave her, part of Juliana waits for his return [while the other part of Juliana has a torrid affair with Zach's hunky younger brother, Ziggy]. But fifteen years later she realizes she has to put some closure on that part of her life in order to move on. [Fifteen years?! Waiting for a boyfriend? If he's been gone fifteen days, you can close the book on this guy.] When she visits Zach’s childhood home, she mysteriously travels through time and finds herself on a burning ship in the eighteenth century.

[Juliana's thought processes, as she awaited Zach's return:

After two days: Where could he be? Zach would never leave me. He must be lying in the bottom of a gorge in his wrecked car. I'll never forgive myself for sending him out to get my tampons.

After two weeks: Maybe he's been kidnapped. And sold into slavery. He'll escape and come back to me. True love conquers all.

After two months: That bastard. He left me for another woman, I just know it. Probably that Marjorie bitch. Or he's dead.

After four months: He fucking well better be dead after what he's put me through.

After ten years: I suppose I should start dating again. But what if Zach's lying in a coma in some third-world hospital? He'd never forgive me. I'll give him another five years, but not a day longer.

After fifteen years: Okay, Zach's probably dead. But there's one other slim possibility: there may be a time portal in the house he grew up in. If there is, and I go through it, maybe he'll still be waiting at the exact spot the time portal goes to, even though fifteen years have passed since he got to that spot.]

When Morgan discovers the stowaway aboard his burning ship, he believes she was sent by his enemy. [Why would his enemy send Juliana to stow away on the ship? Wouldn't he send a man, so the stowaway wouldn't stick out like a sore thumb? And if he did send a woman, wouldn't he send one dressed in 18th-century clothes instead of 21st-century clothes? Does Morgan think his enemy is an idiot? Why are we calling this person "his enemy"? Who is it?] Soon he will realize that Juliana is the woman he left in the twenty-first century. When his enemy captures Juliana, Morgan must confront his past in order fight for the greatest prize of all. [He has to rescue her. Simple as that. Why does he have to confront his past?]

Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.


Notes

You claim Morgan left Juliana in the 21st century. So when Juliana goes to Zach's childhood home fifteen years later, it's actually the future, sometime in the 2016-2022 period, right? Just checking.

Who owns Zach's childhood home? What does Juliana say when she shows up at the door? "Hi, my boyfriend left me fifteen years ago, and he lived here thirty years ago, when he was a kid, so would you mind if I looked around the place in order to help me forget about him?"

Why haven't the people who now live in Zach's childhood home mysteriously traveled to the 18th century?

You call him an ex-pirate. His name's Morgan, he's on a ship, and you compared the book to Pirates of the Caribbean. If he isn't a pirate, tell us what he is.

Why doesn't Morgan recognize Juliana? Sure, she's fifteen years older, but if she just says, "It's me, Juliana . . . from the 21st century," the light bulb should go on immediately.