Monday, May 07, 2007
Guess the Plot
1. She has but one wish before she dies—to kill everyone else on the planet! Simone, feisty bastard daughter of an ex-president, has gotten her manicured nails on a nuke, brother, and isn’t afraid to use it!
2. Obsessed with the drawing of a house she did, a feisty schoolgirl named Simone sets out to find the actual house--if it exists. When she does find it, the owner tries to poison her and then moves to India. But Simone hunts her down for revenge . . . or at least a reasonable explanation.
3. The heartwarming story of a feisty girl who grows up in an orphanage in a Rio de Janeiro ghetto, playing soccer with her older brothers, finally ending up scoring the winning "golden goal" in the Women's World Cup. Also, a sympathetic gas station attendant.
4. Feisty, flatulent, and totally out of control, Simone Brewster wages war on every man who ever wronged her, including Brad Wiltonhouse III, the boyfriend who left her for dead in a drainage ditch on Interstate 55 . . . and then kicked her dog.
5. Simon Cohen has been the starting pitcher for the Temple Beth Tigers for almost a year. Now the college scouts are coming around. How will he tell them he's really his feisty twin sister Simone?
6. Ollie Dunton's meditations in the Nevada desert are disrupted when a spacecraft lands beside his tent. A tall blonde spacewoman climbs out, sporting a pair of amazing ray guns. She zaps Ollie's car into a roaring fireball. This is Simone. She's on the lam from Planet 03, 27, 12. She needs 25 pounds of U238 and she's not leaving until she gets it. Also, a feisty alien dog.
I am seeking representation for my novel Simone. The completed manuscript is fiction and 110,000 words. [Someday someone's gonna claim to have written a novel that's nonfiction; then we'll all feel stupid for having mocked those who claimed to write fiction novels.] Simone is the story of Simone Allocette, who, spurred by the image of a house she has drawn since childhood, journeys across two continents to unravel its mystery – unaware she is hunting down the links to her true identity.
In the midwest in the 1870s, young Simone Allocette becomes obsessed with the image of a house she has drawn many times. When a school assignment has her exchanging letters with an imprisoned man, she offers him a picture of the house which he claims to recognize. Believing she is closer to its meaning, Simone and her mother travel to find the house which is occupied by a woman named Anna.
[Simone: Look mom, I drew a picture of a house.
Mom: Very nice. I'd put it on the refrigerator, except refrigerators haven't been invented yet.
Simone: Can we go to this house?
Mom: It exists?
Simone: Yes, I wrote to a guy in prison and he told me it looks like one he saw in California.
Mom: Okay, I'll book a flight on Travelocity. Oh wait, they haven't invented the Internet yet. Or computers. Or airplanes. Or cars. This inmate you wrote to--are you sure he can be trusted?]
[I've obtained a copy of Simone's drawing, showing the house she and her mother were eventually able to locate. You may view it here.] Simone is at once intrigued by Anna’s affluent lifestyle and tales of great tragedy, but when she tries to find a meaningful connection with her, this woman she has only just met tries to poison her [, but fails when Simone finds Anna's cookies too dry, and surreptitiously slips them to the dog].
Led to believe she had fallen ill, it is six years before Simone learns of the murder attempt [when she returns to confront Anna, and finds the dog dead]. She then pursues an answer, but to find Anna again, Simone must board a ship to India on a journey that is long and hazardous. [Is it really worth traveling to 1870s India just to find out why some woman tried to poison you? If someone showed up uninvited at my door claiming to be obsessed with my house, I'd try to kill her too. Before she killed me.] Once there, amid the time of the British occupation, she pretends to be an English woman and locates Anna in the small village she has moved to. Staying close to her, she begins to learn the secrets explaining the woman’s past actions, and in turn, Simone learns her own past goes back to another life. [Turns out Simone, in a past incarnation, poisoned Anna, in her past incarnation. But the only reason she did so was because in an even earlier incarnation, Anna poisoned Simone. But . . . ]
Your name and information are included in XYZ publication and I believe my novel is suited to your interests. I look forward to hearing from you.
Even if the kid is so talented she's able to draw a picture of a house so accurate it's recognizable to someone who's merely seen the house, I find it hard to believe her mother is going to join her in searching for the house, especially if we're talking about traveling a great distance in the 1870s.
In fact, in the 1870s, parents didn't drop everything just because their kid asked them to, like they do today. Back then they just whipped the kid.
Does Anna know this woman who shows up in her village is the girl she tried to poison? If she recognized her from a past life in the US, seems like she'd also recognize her from a past life in India, even if she is cleverly disguised as an Englishwoman.
It's a pretty inept poisoner who fails to kill a person who doesn't suspect she's being poisoned. How does Simone discover she was poisoned, six years after the fact? It was the CSI guys, right?