Wednesday, December 01, 2010
Guess the Plot
Of Two or More Minds
1. Penta the Hydra's left head (Gil) summons a demon to rid himself of the right head (Sullie) who's hired a mad scientist to off him. When the demon and scientist team up and imprison them it's up to the middle head (Cal) to free them.
2. In half of his mind, Adrian believes he could make Regina happy, despite being a bisexual homophobe. But in the other half, he knows she won't be thrilled to find out he works for a pornographic video production company connected to a Salvadorian child prostitution ring.
3. Charlie the zombie could never do anything right. Instead of just eating brains, he's been gulping down the minds as well. Now he's afflicted with multiple personality syndrome. Can he find a cure before two or more of the minds he's eaten talk him into chomping down on a head and getting hair between his teeth?
4. Kate knew exploring the haunted house at night was a bad idea. Now she has two ghosts possessing her body. One is out for revenge while the other just wants to live a normal life - and they're both in love with Kate.
5. Five-year-old Malcolm could barely read English when he started speaking Spanish, and Swahili and Sanskrit. Psychiatric consultations provide the explanation: three ancient spirits are feuding within Malcolm's mind. Can Malcolm's own mind take control . . . or has he already lost it?
6. When a photo booth generates an exact double of 15 year-old Yin Chee, she thinks it's the solution to her problems. She can party while her double keeps up with the grueling study regime that her parents force on her. Trouble is, her mind simultaneously occupies both bodies. And when her double spontaneously splits, her mind gets shared between three Yins.
Dear Evil and expanding evilness:
Query for novel "Of Two or More Minds"
Adrian's friends attempt a shakedown of his boss by stealing an illegal adult film and threatening to turn it over to authorities. This leaves the sexually confused theater manager playing both sides; [Not clear whether Adrian or his boss is the theater manager.] earnestly trying to prove his loyalty to the company while reluctantly pocketing his share of the stolen cash. [What stolen cash? It was a film they stole. Did the guy pay them off? Usually when someone says a shakedown was attempted, I assume it failed. Otherwise the writer would have just said they shook him down. Why does Adrian get a share? Was he in on the theft? When a guy has something illegal and you steal it from him, you now have something illegal. Seems like you're the one potentially in trouble now. And if he buys the item back, does that make the payment stolen cash?] Actually, Adrian distrusts Lou Davis, his boss, but doesn't know the porn operator had partnered with a Web-based video production company deeply connected to a Salvadorian child prostitution ring. [If you're gonna partner with a child prostitution ring, make it a Guatemalan child prostitution ring or a Nicaraguan child prostitution ring. Anything but a Salvadorean child prostitution ring.] [How come whether I spell it Salvadorean or Salvadorian or Salvadoran, Blogger doesn't tell me it's misspelled? Apparently you can spell it any way you want. Salutatorian. Slovenian. Slobodan Milosevic. Christ, everything works. In El Salvador, spelling bees never end.] He doesn't know Lou's partners had already gained control of the business by turning Lou's weakness against him. Adrian was soon to get set up the same way but gets off much easier, [The younger you are, the easier it is to get off.] the blackmail only having destroyed his half-serious engagement to Regina, [You're dumping me? Just because I'm a blackmailer tangentially involved with child pornography?] his best friend and lover. But he could rationalize that as the fair outcome. A bisexual homophobe not much for sharing is probably not the reliable lover she wanted so to believe. [And probably not the main character we wanted so to cheer for.] Even if he wanted just as much to believe. Belief, it seemed, could be complete in just half of one's mind.
Half of my mind believes this is a hoax. The other half wants to believe it's a hoax.
But just in case it isn't, it needs clarity, it needs paragraphing, and it needs to focus on the Adrian/Regina relationship. If Adrian loves Regina and has no idea he works for a porn producer and then he finds out, but his criminal bosses threaten to kill him if he quits . . . Nah. I don't see anything making us want to root for a homophobic blackmailer who is torn about remaining loyal to a company connected with child porn. I recommend putting this novel in a trunk and writing one about kittens.
If you want to make money by stealing, it's kind of stupid to steal from a criminal involved in a sleazy racket. You could end up sleeping with the fishes. Better to steal from a little old lady, so you only have to worry about the police.