Friday, January 14, 2011
Guess the Plot
The Land of Endless Night
1. Frustrated bowler and evil-warlock-in-training, Hackasack, has fumbled a spell on the black light lamps at Bowling Land, causing a town-wide eclipse of the sun. Only a perfect game can break the spell. Can bowling wonder Rory save the town?
2. Fifty years ago, the town of Elklarshire reneged on a deal the citizens made with a warlock to save their children from a plague. Now, the children are about to see light for the very first time. Ironically, the light at the end of the tunnel is a train.
3. In a land where volcanic ash has blocked out the sun, an evil overlord with the ability to turn rabbits into bloodthirsty weredingos attempts to gain dominion over the puny people. Can 16-year-old Dara and her ragtag companions thwart Gurodun before he destroys the vessels containing the essences of their abilities? Or is everyone doomed?
4. Doctor Lye tried to convince humanity that the upcoming solar eclipse was a plot by vampires to blot out the sun. He failed and eternal night engulfed the Earth. Now his son leads the underground resistance in adapting an amusement park attraction into a moon-destroying missile.
5. Everyone except Sunny is excited about moving to the planet Nero, which is devoid of shopping malls and eligible boys, and gets no sunlight. Sunny’s wardrobe, love life and sexy tan are doomed. How can Sunny shine in . . . The Land of Endless Night?
6. That opaque dome over Las Vegas was supposed to boost the economy ten-fold by creating an endless night: more night means more drinking, more gambling, more commercial sex. But some fiend blew up the power supply. Now the oxygen is dwindling, the lights are out, and the survival of Lotty Cha-cha and her dancing chorus depends on groping their way to an exit before they suffocate.
Dear Evil One,
Dara is not a typical sixteen-year-old. Sure, she never met a chore she didn’t hate, and seeing a cute boy makes her heart beat faster. But she also spends hours a day learning to use lethal weapons, including some she wields with her mind.
She’ll need that training after a power-hungry overseer [Not bad, but I'm not sure "power-hungry overseer" has enough cachet to capture the minions' hearts like such villains as ruthless vigilante sorcerers and brutal eunuchs once did.] named Gurodun attempts to destroy the Light Gems--vessels containing the essence of the unique abilities of all the people of Dara’s world. With powerful dark gems in his possession, Gurodun feels he no longer needs the paltry gift the Light Gems give him. [Do dark gems contain the essence of the unique abilities of the power-hungry overseers of Dara's world? Because if they aren't pretty similar to Light Gems, maybe they should have a name that's not so similar.] Once the Gems are gone, and everyone’s gifts fade, he’ll be well on his way to attaining dominion over them all. [But will he be happy? Wouldn't it be like having dominion over sheep?] [If the dark gems are so powerful, and the Light Gems provide paltry gifts, why can't Gurodun attain dominion now? More importantly, if the dark gems are more powerful, how come only the Light Gems rate capital letters?] Dara’s grandfather thwarts Gurodun’s plans by using telekinesis to scatter the Gems to the far reaches of their world. The effort takes his life.
Her grandfather’s sacrifice is only a temporary fix, however. It’s only a matter of time before Gurodun hunts down the Gems. Dara sets her grief aside and joins forces with a small group bent on stopping him at all costs.
It may cost them everything given that Gurodun’s newfound talents include a potent knack for controlling others with his speech, the ability to mutate innocuous animals into bloodthirsty predators, and the power to revive a long-extinct race of shape-shifters. [This query seems a bit long, and this is the paragraph it can do without.]
A gifted seer provides clues [It's gifted seer vs. power-hungry overseer in Extreme Sage Fighting.] that lead Dara and her companions to a land covered in dormant volcanoes with more than just rock formations hidden in their shadows. The group must put aside their differences, and attractions, as they struggle across perilous terrain to reach the first Gem before Gurodun gets it--or gets them. [The first Gem? Does Gurodun have to find the Gems in a specific order? Couldn't he be going after any of the scattered Gems?]
THE LAND OF ENDLESS NIGHT is a YA fantasy complete at 76,000 words. It can stand alone, but has series potential.
[Note to EE-- the title comes from the name the land (where the first Gem is found) used to be called in ancient times because ash was constantly blocking the sun there.]
If scattering the Gems to the far reaches of the land is gonna be fatal, grandpa should have just put the whole batch at the bottom of the ocean.
How many Light Gems are there? Five? One for every person?
Why was Dara spending hours a day training with lethal weapons even before the Gurodun threat came along?
How is it that grandpa has access to all of the Light Gems in the first place? I mean, if the essence of my unique abilities were in a gem/vessel, I'd want that gem/vessel in Fort Knox or at least somewhere requiring the power-hungry overseer to perform a cavity search to get it. I wouldn't entrust it to Dara's grandfather. Yet apparently gramps has all of the Gems.
How many people live in this world? I mean, if some evil overlord were trying to gain dominion over humans on Earth, there'd be more than a 16-year-old and her band of companions trying to stop him. Where are the armies?
It would be nice if the query didn't prompt so many questions, or if it answered a few of them.