Why you don't get published.
Unchosen captions:You asked of me who's most evil? Do hark: tis not you, but Miss Snarky Shark. --Angela RobbinsI've got this novel about publishing from the computer's point of view... --Faceless MinionOf course you're the fairest of them all! Eh . . . is the mirror out of the ICU yet?--arhooleyWell, uh, me and the TV got to talking and, uh, we're leaving you. And I'm pregnant. --anon.Ooh! Press that one again! --anon.It's about a faithful but naive servant inappropriately touched by a manipulative, egomaniacal master... --anon.'Whoops, my bad. Just don't breathe in for a while.' --McKoalaIt looks like you're writing a soul-crushing rejection letter, would you like some help?--M.G.E.OK, grumpy Gus, I know you got a Mac because Macs are just friendlier, so let's see if we can't cheer you up, I know, we'll take a rummage through your WIP folder shall we, it's just -- whoops! Y'know, you'll laugh about this later... --anon.Well..if I'd told you I used to belong to a wannabe author, you'd never have taken me home! --khazar-khum
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