Friday, June 01, 2012

Amusing Excerpt 8

Actual (or not) amusing (or not) excerpts from (or not from) minions' WIPs. If you have constructive criticism or unadulterated praise, feel free to comment.


 Setup: Conrad and Esmerelda have just discovered their cat, Stash, cat-napped.


I admit it, I cried.

Conrad cried too, though in a more refined, masculine sort of way. I bawled like a baby, sitting on the tailgate of the Jeep.

"I should never have left him," I sobbed.

"We," Conrad corrected. "We should never have left him."

"You had things on your mind. You were concocting a plan. I ... I was his mother."

A fresh wash of tears poured down my face.

Conrad comforted me in one of the only two ways he knows how. He petted my hair affectionately, absently, as if I were a large dog he was rather fond of. In the beginning of our relationship I found this habit insufferably annoying. Now I found it endearing.

(The second method he has of comforting me would not have been appropriate at this time.)

--Ezzie

4 comments:

Dave Fragments said...

Although it fills me with dread, do these characters die of heartbreak over their kitty cat kitty-napping in the next 100 words? Or do they invite the coppers to solve the case of the caterwauling kitty-napper of Constantinople?

Ezzie said...

They embark on a mission to rescue the wayward kitty (the cat is a prototype robotic cat, and the two are a husband-and-wife team of mad scientists). Action and super-science ensue.

I like the idea of sending them to Constantinople, though.

Mister Furkles said...

I really object to the idea of illegal alien cats taking away the jobs of real American born kitties. Even more disgusting is the sick notion of replacing real patriotic USA kitties with fake robot faux cats. I presume this is some kind of dark horror story?

AlaskaRavenclaw said...

If it were made possible for cats to move to this country legally, without special favoritism to cats from Cuba, etc, then the cats wouldn't need to be "illegal".

I've never understood why one particular kitty should be granted special privileges over another, just because of the place his litter was born.