Monday, December 12, 2011
Guess the Plot
1. Being a flea is tough especially when your entire village was destroyed by poisonous fumes and giant brushes. Is a journey worth a jump to find a new home?
2. When spunky redhead Gidget meets hunky Bert, she falls hard for him. Only one problem--he's a popular athlete, and she's just your average ghoul. Can she make him see that looks and being alive aren't everything?
3. Polly Microbial is a concerned Necrotizing Fasciitis – a flesh eating bacterium. To keep human scientists from trying to eradicate her kind with new antibacterial medicines, she implores her fellow bacteria to consume sparingly to save the host. For this, she becomes a pariah and is ridiculed as an enviro-nazi.
4. Being the only shapeshifter in the junior class sucks, especially when you haven't learned to control your power yet and you're talking to that hawt senior, Johnny Post, and you start to sprout scales.
5. An accident leaves a teenager horribly disfigured, but also gives her supernatural powers, powers she must quickly learn to control if she's to rescue her mother from the mad plastic surgeon who's taken her hostage.
6. Mad scientist Max Magma invents the top secret nuclear-powered magnetotron. He'll drill into the South Pole, bore along the planetary axis to the North Pole, install a drain to suck the Arctic Ocean through the molten core, and spew out a giant geyser on top of the Antarctic ice fields, saving Mae Wong's secret tropical island paradise from climate-change flooding.
7. Linda Lampquist, biochemstry major, finds a thumb drive containing the secret formula for a miraculous wrinkle cream. Who lost it? She has no idea, but she's determined to beat them to the patent office and cash in on this bonanza.
8. A tattoo artist comes back from lunch and finds the waiting room full of green space aliens who all want a rose and I LOV U and they promise to vaporize his wife Loretta if he screws up, but OMG, their skin is like rawhide.
I am currently seeking representation for a 60,000 YA horror novel titled Skin Deep. [My attempt to determine what a horror novel could have 60,000 of that's abbreviated YA turned up "yoctoamperes," a unit of electrical current equal to 10−24 amperes. I don't actually see how you could torture someone with such a tiny amount, but maybe if you were trying to create life by combining body parts of dead fleas in a novel called Frankenflea...]
Quinn is the only survivor of a bus crash which leaves her horribly scarred, mentally and physically. After months in the hospital and an attempted suicide, Quinn is finally ready to go home. ["If you're gonna try to kill yourself, we recommend doing it at home where there aren't dozens of medical personnel hanging around hoping for the opportunity to keep you alive."]
She even meets a doctor who says he can completely cure her scars. [I don't get the meaning of "even" in that sentence. It implies a stronger relationship between this sentence and what's come before than has been established.]
But the doctor has a secret supernatural agenda. [Which is?] His tools for restoring youth and beauty to the jet-set are a trifle … unorthodox. And he’s bored. [Using my supernatural powers to remove the scars of mildly disfigured people bores me. Where's the phantom of the opera when I need him?] Quinn’s disfigured flesh is just the challenge he’s been looking for. He’s even willing to take Quinn’s mother hostage to get control of Quinn. [Better use of the word "even." But it's not clear why he has to take Mom hostage. Doesn't Quinn want his cure? Why not?
I can make you beautiful again.
Okay, let's get start-- Wait a minute, do you have a secret supernatural agenda?]
Fortunately for Quinn, her close brush with death has left her with a few supernatural secrets of her own. [The bus crashed into a nuclear waste facility.] Will she learn to trust them before it’s too late? And will she be able to find her mother in time to put them to use? Or will she fall under the control of a madman in a last-ditch effort to save her mom? [A lot of questions. Got any answers?]
I would be delighted to send you a sample chapter or the complete manuscript at your request. Thank you for your time and consideration.
This is a new query and a new title for the book formerly known as Quinn's Law (Face-Lift 955).
What are Quinn's supernatural abilities?
We're now out of queries and openings. And as soon as we get some we'll be needing fake plots and continuations. Is it your turn?