Thursday, March 12, 2009
Guess the Plot
How to Save a Prince
1. Put him in touch with Clive Davis, get him back on his old record label, keep him away from Jehovah's Witnesses, and tell him to finally write that sequel to Purple Rain.
2. The Prince is in mortal danger, and it looks like it's up to a new student at the kingdom's most elite magic academy to use her powers to end the threat. Aided by a dead wizard, can Jo learn to control her abilities in time to figure out . . . How to Save a Prince?
3. A how-to manual covering such methods as pickling, pressing between the pages of the encyclopedia, safe deposit boxes, and sturdy zip-loc freezer bags.
4. Throughout the Coalition of Kingdoms, princes are falling into enchanted sleep, being locked in doorless towers, and being cast out of their homes by cruel, jealous stepfathers. When a plucky woodcutter's daughter determines to go on a quest, she must first decide: Which prince should she save?
5. Wizard Larenious is fed up with people coming to him for advice about rescuing various captured individuals, so he writes a manual for would-be adventurers. To his shock it becomes an instant best-seller. Now he's got the world's literati after him. What does he have to do to catch a break?
6. Manny’s doing his best to save the world’s ever-dwindling supply of princes. Everything’s peachy until he catches a saboteur in his top-secret canning facilites. His one rival, who favors mummification, is playing nasty. Well, Manny’ll just have to play nastier.
Dear Evil Editor,
I am seeking representation my 80,000 word YA fantasy, HOW TO SAVE A PRINCE, where seventeen-year-old Jo must use her new magical abilities to save the handsome Prince of Ellisar. Even if using those abilities destroys her in the process.
For Johanna Jergensen, admission to the elite Teras Academy is her chance to escape a bleak future as a farmer's wife. But at seventeen, she's the oldest student ever admitted, a fact that doesn't escape the disgruntled classmates who are determined to make her new life hell. Her only ally is the ghost of a long-dead wizard and he's not much help against mortal enemies.
When Jo almost kills another student, she discovers [realizes] that her new gift comes with a price. With every spell she craves more power [She's addicted. I remember when this happened to Buffy's friend Willow. It wasn't pretty.] and with each use her dark magic threatens to spin out of control. As if that isn't enough to handle, things go from bad to worse when she stumbles across the body of a dead Guardian. The man's death unravels [exposes] a plot that threatens the very kingdom and puts Prince Nerrith in mortal danger. There is a traitor loose in Ellisar and Jo may be the only person with the power to stop him. But will using her new abilities unleash an even greater evil?
I would be glad to send you my complete manuscript for review. Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
I think this is well-written. Although somehow the name Jo Jergensen doesn't sound like one I'd expect in Prince Nerrith's kingdom of Ellisar.
I may be wrong in assuming this is a magic academy. Since attending a normal academy could be the only way to escape life as a farmer's wife, you might make it clear (maybe call it the Teras Academy of Wirardry, or something similar). For all I can tell, it's a normal school and Jo's the only person with magical abilities.
If it is a magic academy, and all the other students have been at the school longer than Jo, why is she the only one with the power to stop the traitor? What about graduates of the school, who are now full-fledged wizards? Wouldn't they be more powerful than Jo, who just started going there? Why is her magic "special"?
If it isn't a magic academy, why does Jo suddenly have this gift?