tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post7623837745058687211..comments2024-03-26T18:28:06.391-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: Face-Lift 439Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-10008596472884081902007-10-23T10:11:00.000-04:002007-10-23T10:11:00.000-04:00Hmm. I always thought that if a time period wasn'...Hmm. I always thought that if a time period wasn't indicated, the novel could be assumed to be contemporary. What sayeth EE?<BR/><BR/>As for disliking Georgian, perhaps he dislikes it precisely because it's a rehash. His dislike doesn't have to be rational, after all--merely rationalised :D.nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-637385826596200592007-10-23T09:48:00.000-04:002007-10-23T09:48:00.000-04:00Maybe I'm an idiot but the big mystery distracting...Maybe I'm an idiot but the big mystery distracting me was: where is this happening? And when? Putting the clues together I finally figured its more or less England. But is it supposed to be the 1960s? '70s? 90's? Or now? You could just orient readers early on by briefly stating that into.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-22662954484987486862007-10-22T22:43:00.000-04:002007-10-22T22:43:00.000-04:00Too right, CL. I wonder where Rod's been, lately? ...Too right, CL. I wonder where Rod's been, lately? <BR/><BR/>I miss that guy.Robin S.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03258459688300851984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-80420426310569786422007-10-22T21:08:00.000-04:002007-10-22T21:08:00.000-04:00Buffysquirrel,There's a lot of good stuff in the q...Buffysquirrel,<BR/><BR/>There's a lot of good stuff in the query. I like architecture, so I'm drawn to imagery like the decrepit Georgian house and the ruins of the Roman villa. Overall the book sounds promising.<BR/><BR/>Good luck.Lightsmithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00396366702192330680noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1064010983663778672007-10-22T20:53:00.000-04:002007-10-22T20:53:00.000-04:00Robin likes it because amid all the construction, ...Robin likes it because amid all the construction, there's Rod the Roofer.<BR/>;-)Chris Eldinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11794946908789120139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-64322042655777941752007-10-22T20:40:00.000-04:002007-10-22T20:40:00.000-04:00Ooops, Thanks EE. Tom Hanks, Shelly Long - The Mon...Ooops, Thanks EE. <BR/>Tom Hanks, Shelly Long - The Money PitDave Fragmentshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17985158361431606939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-69274422341934509622007-10-22T19:18:00.000-04:002007-10-22T19:18:00.000-04:00Thanks for comments :). The book is meant to be m...Thanks for comments :). The book is meant to be modestly amusing, otherwise things like the estate agents cleverly photographing the house so it looks intact in their details would probably be picked apart for their authenticity.nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-45489611794521869072007-10-22T18:54:00.000-04:002007-10-22T18:54:00.000-04:00Hi author,No commenting on the query from me, but ...Hi author,<BR/><BR/>No commenting on the query from me, but I really like the idea behind this - it sounds like my kind of read.<BR/><BR/>Good luck with your query tightening. <BR/><BR/>I like your title.Robin S.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03258459688300851984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-57249476233673910092007-10-22T18:02:00.000-04:002007-10-22T18:02:00.000-04:00That's The Money Pit.That's <I>The Money Pit.</I>Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-91939625587720361232007-10-22T17:13:00.000-04:002007-10-22T17:13:00.000-04:00Why don't you try something like: Much to the chag...Why don't you try something like: <BR/><I><BR/>Much to the chagrin of his family, Mike Galbreath removates the houses they live in and then sells the finished project forcing them to move into his next project. When Mike buys a Georgian House on Coldharbour Lane and discovers an old Roman Villa behind it, he not only has to contend with his family, but the neighbors too. One neighbor grows pot. Another neighbor steals artifacts from the Villa. And the third neighbor begins to redocorate the neighboring house in Georgian style. To compound the troubles, the local zoning board declares his house a landmark. <BR/><BR/>Can Mike save his marraige, become a hero to his kids, renovate two houses at once, and navigate the neighborhood situation? Or will Coldharbour lane be his downfall?" </I><BR/><BR/>My problem with this is that most men, even those reasonably good weekend warriors, never seem to finish their toolsheds and workrooms, let alone finish renovating an entire house. I know grown men who've never lifted a hammer in their lives and couldn't say what the proper end of the nail is... I had to teach their kids how to measure wood and cut it with a saw. I know guys who think a the butter knives are screwdrivers. <BR/><BR/>So, you see my problem? <BR/><BR/>What is Mike Galbreath's single accomplishment in these 100,000 words? Is it finishing the house? Saving his marraige? Or merely dealing with his neighbors. <BR/><BR/>Just renovating houses, although it's kinda hot and sexy, is not going to keep the reader going. You need more of a story. I think it's there and you just have to get past all of the complications this guy has to face. They are merely portions of Mike's personal struggle. <BR/><BR/>Is it Mike's marraige? His Kids? the strange Roman Villa holds dread secrets about Jesus? The Georgian Mansion really does contain the bones of George the (whatever number)? <BR/>What powers your story. <BR/><BR/>If this makes no sense, then go look at a movie titled "My Life as a House" with Kevin Kline. That's a story about house renovations. Or on the comedy side "The Money Trap."<BR/><BR/>AS for the GTP's - I want to meet Santiago and his spud gun.Dave Fragmentshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17985158361431606939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-33558019374607460642007-10-22T16:20:00.000-04:002007-10-22T16:20:00.000-04:00Unless he's a contractor who knows how to do every...Unless he's a contractor who knows how to do everything, Michael is in way over his head. He can't do much with three walls & a chimney--if I understand British law he would be unable to do much of anything with the wreck.<BR/><BR/>And the villa--if he finds mosaics & has a good idea of the walls, he might be able to rebuild it. But doing so will require a tremendous capital outlay (atually this applies to both projects).<BR/><BR/>How can he do this on her salary?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-46610947046539741412007-10-22T15:25:00.000-04:002007-10-22T15:25:00.000-04:00The Britisher-than-thou Dhaliwals at number 2...Fu...<I>The Britisher-than-thou Dhaliwals at number 2...</I><BR/><BR/>Funnily enough, I recently saw a re-run of the British sketch show "Goodness Gracious Me" that, you know, pokes fun at Britisher-than-thou Indian immigrants. (The show is written by and stars 2nd generation ethnic Indian comedians, by the way.)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-89561600460770773022007-10-22T15:20:00.000-04:002007-10-22T15:20:00.000-04:00[Is the book a comedy, or are the neighbors just c...<I>[Is the book a comedy, or are the neighbors just comic relief?]</I><BR/><BR/>I suspect they're quirky literary characters that add color. Perhaps.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-35570252592735648702007-10-22T15:11:00.000-04:002007-10-22T15:11:00.000-04:00Reading through, some elements of this immediately...Reading through, some elements of this immediately bring to mind "My Life as a House". Not sure if that's useful information, but there it is...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-86938499132815375252007-10-22T14:46:00.000-04:002007-10-22T14:46:00.000-04:00I actually like the name Coldharbour Lane... The o...I actually like the name Coldharbour Lane... The only issue I noticed was the sharp cross between a suspense thriller and then the sudden insert of comic relief, then the jump back again. But it does sound interesting... :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-53232490099426863792007-10-22T14:34:00.000-04:002007-10-22T14:34:00.000-04:00Wow, we're having a run on pot-growing hippies lat...Wow, we're having a run on pot-growing hippies lately, too. :-)<BR/><BR/>And, just nitpicking, I have a hard time with the husband/wife partnership on something as major as living in construction sites, as they strongly disagree about Georgian architecture (or whatever). No marriage could survive that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-90369326193488449842007-10-22T13:37:00.000-04:002007-10-22T13:37:00.000-04:00Can you condence the first three paragraphs (I'm c...Can you condence the first three paragraphs (I'm counting the first sentence as a paragraph since it's separated)into one? Or add some of that info in later? I'm thinking your hook is in paragraph 4 with the mystery. I'd want to get that out asap for an agent to keep reading the query. And - I need more info about that mystery as it unfolds - tell us what's going on there. The end seemed abrupt and I think this addition could help with that. <BR/><BR/>I think you could have a good story here - I just need more about the mystery b/c that's what got me most interested.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com