tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post425917460356543925..comments2024-03-26T18:28:06.391-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: Face-Lift 569Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger39125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-39389052607335092602008-09-29T20:14:00.000-04:002008-09-29T20:14:00.000-04:00Loved GTP 5!Loved GTP 5!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-39509699643566541802008-09-27T11:21:00.000-04:002008-09-27T11:21:00.000-04:00"Hey, I still play with toys."Dare we ask what kin..."Hey, I still play with toys."<BR/><BR/>Dare we ask what kind?Julie Weathershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13725236516593676381noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-58326891760510859212008-09-27T10:43:00.000-04:002008-09-27T10:43:00.000-04:00Rachel,Great story idea. Other variations on old ...Rachel,<BR/><BR/>Great story idea. Other variations on old stories for Middle Grade readers are Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine (made into a movie) and A Mid-Semester Night's Dream by Margaret Meacham. These "re-tellings" are hot right now.<BR/><BR/>Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-30766287112544994932008-09-27T00:36:00.000-04:002008-09-27T00:36:00.000-04:00Rachel, this is a clever and original riff on the ...Rachel, this is a clever and original riff on the original, which has now achieved folkloric status. Go for it!<BR/><BR/>One suggestion: to avoid lawsuits and to modernize the story, and also because the subject of the transformation is female, how about substituting for the cricket a clipboard-wielding ladybug (or she could wear a Bella Abzug-type hat) who advocates feminist views.talpiannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13978075304795724185noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-31443111825126356742008-09-26T17:42:00.000-04:002008-09-26T17:42:00.000-04:00EE, I'm not sure I want to know about the toys you...EE, I'm not sure I want to know about the toys <I>you</I> play with.Renee Collinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08170818341212519937noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-87556784716267774762008-09-26T16:17:00.000-04:002008-09-26T16:17:00.000-04:00By the way... Disney and Pinocchio aside...I have ...By the way... <BR/>Disney and Pinocchio aside...<BR/><BR/>I have trouble with: <BR/><I>abandons Nick to a nightmarish fate: Melanie, an eight-inch-high, bubble-gum popping doll.</I><BR/><BR/>Abandon isn't the right word here. It stopped me cold. And the way I read it was wrong. I think you want to say his fate is <I>teaching</I> or <I>mentoring</I> Melanie.<BR/><BR/>Be careful of sentence length. There's a few very long sentences that take time and effort to read.Dave Fragmentshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17985158361431606939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-76605824560490634792008-09-26T15:24:00.000-04:002008-09-26T15:24:00.000-04:00Children love to read about characters older than ...Children love to read about characters older than they are. It makes them feel older themselves. Fourteen is a nice age, if you can avoid issues that are more YA. <BR/><BR/>I thought the query had a lot of bounce and energy. I really liked it. I also thought more of Toy Story than Pinnochio.<BR/><BR/>Anyway author, good luck!Chris Eldinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11794946908789120139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-16680681696862747402008-09-26T15:16:00.000-04:002008-09-26T15:16:00.000-04:00When you say no one sent GTPs, EE, I know that's c...When you say no one sent GTPs, EE, I know that's code for how much you miss my participation. ; )<BR/><BR/>I'll try to keep up on this in the future. I used to submit one a day, like a vitamin.Stacyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03365582623380288038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-37406314547583575502008-09-26T14:33:00.000-04:002008-09-26T14:33:00.000-04:00Benwah and renee,You guys bring up good points abo...Benwah and renee,<BR/><BR/>You guys bring up good points about the age. I'm trying to appeal to 9 - 12 year-olds. Right now Nick's an eighth grader into video games and soccer. He notices girls. He's horrified at the idea of carrying around a doll. In fact, he refuses but she sneaks into his backpack anyway and humiliates him. <BR/><BR/>I liked the idea of the awkardness of middle school coupled with the problem of hiding an obnoxious talking doll, but he could be younger if it works better for the story.Rachel Burtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10274442663967438226noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-68389907594536857012008-09-26T14:23:00.000-04:002008-09-26T14:23:00.000-04:00Hey, I still play with toys.Hey, <I>I</I> still play with toys.Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-22368772940059064462008-09-26T14:13:00.000-04:002008-09-26T14:13:00.000-04:00Having seen the author's comments, I'm liking this...Having seen the author's comments, I'm liking this one more.Whirlochrehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09846196906206886945noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-75158097327774785652008-09-26T14:05:00.000-04:002008-09-26T14:05:00.000-04:00You have a cute idea and well written query. I rea...You have a cute idea and well written query. I read the Velveteen Rabbit when I was a little girl and I always hoped that my toys would become real. I think kids will enjoy this.<BR/><BR/>I will echo what benwah said though, fourteen seemed too old for the MC. I think the readers that will enjoy this the most will still play with toys. Fourteen year olds do not. Even going with the standard that kids read two years older, most twelve year olds don't play with toys. Maybe eight or ten would be better age for Nick.Renee Collinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08170818341212519937noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-52758080932197259352008-09-26T13:59:00.001-04:002008-09-26T13:59:00.001-04:00Oops. The trouble with gmail is that once someone ...Oops. The trouble with gmail is that once someone sends something, others can send mail on the same subject, and the original senders name appears as the sender until you open it. Two GTPs were sent by anonymous.Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-15134545767768489562008-09-26T13:59:00.000-04:002008-09-26T13:59:00.000-04:00Oops, I google-outed myself! Ah well, nice to meet...Oops, I google-outed myself! Ah well, nice to meet you all.Rachel Burtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10274442663967438226noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-58349523704528924122008-09-26T13:49:00.000-04:002008-09-26T13:49:00.000-04:00EE - you make me blush (it's about time someone co...EE - you make me blush (it's about time someone could!) But to be honest, I only submitted the last three continuations.<BR/><BR/>Thank you so much - I am still having a hard time with the stroke, but I have a new device which allows me to write a little better. (It's a special keyboard, not a brain plug in, which I would have preferred.)<BR/><BR/>This particular opening is really charming, and I love the idea of the Pinocchio character - the author is so right about the boy's psychotic personality, too. I'd love to read this entire ms.<BR/><BR/>KateKate Thorntonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16449435177807306686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-45472096027774140262008-09-26T13:20:00.000-04:002008-09-26T13:20:00.000-04:00Author here.Thanks for the discussion all.I unders...Author here.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the discussion all.<BR/><BR/>I understand your POV Writtenwyrd and accept others may share it, but obviously I feel differently. I've already referenced Wicked, where Gregory Maguire take Baum's character, the Wicked Witch of the West, and writes her backstory. Am I correct in assuming you dislike his mechanism? I also like the idea behind Jasper Fforde's "Lost in a Good Book" series, though the execution was a bit disappointing to me.<BR/><BR/>In the original - and the Disney, since we all seem familiar with that - Pinocchio is very young, and pretty wicked (the original is much darker). My premise was what if he was a modern day teenager who didn't remember his beginnings? I loved that question, but coming up with the character was still all up to me, since twelve long years have passed and presumably he's grown into his own person.<BR/><BR/>But thanks for taking the time to comment; I do want to hear all opinions - the good and the bad.Rachel Burtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10274442663967438226noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-27424405331692791022008-09-26T13:04:00.000-04:002008-09-26T13:04:00.000-04:00Actually, I believe both the book and the film end...Actually, I believe both the book and the film end just after Pinocchio becomes a boy. This story takes up so much later, he doesn't even remember he wasn't always a boy. Plus his name is Nick, not Pinocchio. I don't see the problem.<BR/><BR/>Heck, this would sound more derivative of Toy Story if Pinocchio hadn't been mentioned at the end.Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-41348633145978926412008-09-26T12:58:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:58:00.000-04:00The query is great. If your story reads similarly...The query is great. If your story reads similarly, I'm sure it is equally great.<BR/><BR/>Don't know the definitive answer on the legal issues, but the question would be whether your story is a derivative work. The original may be in the public domain, but Disney could assert rights in anything it deems derivative of its copyrighted works. Parodies are excluded. Seems like it would turn on how much of your story borrows major/basic aspects from Disney's.<BR/><BR/>In a case like this, EE, do you try to figure it out or let the agent/editor worry about it?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-30893859766455202982008-09-26T12:50:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:50:00.000-04:00Those are some good gtp's too.Those are some good gtp's too.writtenwyrddhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02280711822302493122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-11501977246499912732008-09-26T12:42:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:42:00.000-04:00I think a lot of great work derives from old stori...I think a lot of great work derives from old stories. The originality comes from what kind of twist a writer can give it.<BR/><BR/>This sounds like a great read. Good luck, author!Stacyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03365582623380288038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-46313203591068221352008-09-26T12:37:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:37:00.000-04:00I should have mentioned in the notes that all five...I should have mentioned in the notes that all five GTPs were submitted by Kate Thornton. No one else submitted any. Welcome back Kate.Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-80276758475611916932008-09-26T12:32:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:32:00.000-04:00http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Talking_Crickethttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Talking_CricketEvil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-21704271586914079222008-09-26T12:11:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:11:00.000-04:00We can all agree to disagree on this point, but I ...We can all agree to disagree on this point, but I believe that riffing off of a fairy tale that's got a number of versions and which isn't exactly written by one individual isn't the same thing as taking a story that's been written by a known individual and writing a sort of continuation. <BR/><BR/>I probably would love your story, author. It sounds great. But I just object to using some other person's work to jump start your own--in a literal sense, not just riffing off ideas, which every writer does to some extent. If no laws are broken, you aren't wrong to use Pinocchio, Dracula, Scarlett O'Hara or whichever other character or world you want to 'borrow' from. I just object to it viscerally as a 'cheat' and you obviously do not. And that's okay. <BR/><BR/>The difference is that the first example is an individual's creation that is being used to source the story, while the fairy tales are not one person's creation but a cultural artifact.<BR/><BR/>It was the cricket that made me think Disney, by the way. I didn't make that clear. I believe there's no cricket in the original, just in Disney's version--but it's been at least 30 years since I read it and I could be entirely wrong on that point.writtenwyrddhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02280711822302493122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-9057470521328119702008-09-26T12:02:00.000-04:002008-09-26T12:02:00.000-04:00Beware of Disney. Disney might just decide that th...Beware of Disney. Disney might just decide that the cricket is too much like their franchise and that would be it. They are ruthless and have deep, deep pockets to buy the result they want.Dave Fragmentshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17985158361431606939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-87356793784683957322008-09-26T11:58:00.000-04:002008-09-26T11:58:00.000-04:00No, if there's a cricket in the original, you can ...No, if there's a cricket in the original, you can use a cricket. Apparently it's not the same cricket if the original was murdered by Pinocchio. But apparently your cricket holds no grudge for his brother's demise.Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.com