tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post8567569214018269813..comments2024-03-26T18:28:06.391-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: New Beginning 796Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-64372119801981807332010-10-21T07:58:49.688-04:002010-10-21T07:58:49.688-04:00This is probably just me but I thought Zeke-the-pa...This is probably just me but I thought Zeke-the-partner was the narrator's boyfriend so I'm kinda confused as to why he's sitting at the chair beside the bed. But I would certainly read on to see what happened next.<br /><br />The continuation was hysterical!Sylviahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05925593802209715440noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-49804414233580950492010-10-19T14:28:36.333-04:002010-10-19T14:28:36.333-04:00I stumbled over "our apartment is draftier th...I stumbled over "our apartment is draftier than a frilly skirt on a windy day."<br /><br />I've lived in drafty houses and apartments, and in homes where the doors don't latch properly. If a door swings open it's not a draft - the window is open or the front/back door are open. (First, however, I've ruled out the people and the pets and totally disregarded the burglar because of the dogs.) <br /><br />Then comes my second problem, let's assume this apartment is that drafty. I can live with that. <br /><br />However, this reads like the narrator has experience with ghosts. Would not her/his first thought be . . . here comes that ghost again? Rather than we have an extremely drafty apartment?<br /><br /> In the same manner that I would think, "that must be Lady, (my mastiff)" <br /><br />vkwvkwnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-91830508431209106972010-10-19T13:38:41.333-04:002010-10-19T13:38:41.333-04:00I'm away from my computer and can't login....I'm away from my computer and can't login. I agree with EE. I was confused with two unknown presences in the house. Saying "Zeke says from the chair," fixes that problem. <br /><br />I remember the query that matches this query. This has a nice tone of voice and a comfortable voice. Good work.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-45620695685254614752010-10-19T10:16:04.097-04:002010-10-19T10:16:04.097-04:00I have no problems with this. It seems a bit odd t...I have no problems with this. It seems a bit odd that the narrator has been asleep hours and Zeke is sitting in a chair in her bedroom when he could be in the room outside her door, but there must be a reason for giving her no privacy.<br /><br />Also, instead of "a voice says from the chair..." you might say "Zeke says from the chair," avoiding giving the impression she doesn't know whose voice that is.Evil Editorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.com