tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post6636447139320028933..comments2024-03-26T18:28:06.391-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: Synopsis 31Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-37420912059591823412012-06-16T08:39:08.452-04:002012-06-16T08:39:08.452-04:00I don't see anything in the synopsis that says...I don't see anything in the synopsis that says the author is proud of the government. It's more likely they've set their story in Britain because they are, yanno, British.<br /><br />Of course other Brits are then going to come along and make fun. Especially as the country's already being run by villains, albeit ones with nothing super about them.<br /><br />When other people mock our country, however, we bristle a little. Then shrug and go back to watching the cricket.<br /><br /><i>And tell the pleasant prince this mock of his<br />Hath turn'd his balls to gun-stones; and his soul<br />Shall stand sore charged for the wasteful vengeance<br />That shall fly with them: for many a thousand widows<br />Shall this his mock mock out of their dear husbands;<br />Mock mothers from their sons, mock castles down;<br />And some are yet ungotten and unborn<br />That shall have cause to curse the Dauphin's scorn.</i>nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-20082493332938966802012-06-15T22:05:23.667-04:002012-06-15T22:05:23.667-04:00Fabian Romano sounds like you just put together &q...Fabian Romano sounds like you just put together "the" Fabian and Ray Romano (because you thought Armani would sound stupid). Don't you know any Italian last names? How about Marconi or Baretta or Barbarino?<br /><br />Anyway, that's not the biggest deal. Definitely put things in chronological order just like it happens in the book. As EE noted, they find prisoners in Germany before they travel there. <br /><br />I agree that "Machiavellian Anomalies" is just shouting "We're the bad guys!!!" Who would ever do business with them? <br /><br />Yes, I get that you're British and you're proud of your government. But you might have noticed that others find the idea of supervillians taking over Parliament a little more amusing than terrifying. Sorry, but there just needs to be bigger stakes. I'm pretty sure supervillains couldn't run it LESS efficiently.<br /><br />The lead poisoning thing just creeps me out. The effects are usually reversible for adults, not so much for children, and this girl is sixteen. Kidney damage is a big issue. Neurological damage can result in degenerative disorders later in life. Brain damage is possible. I feel a little sick to my stomach thinking about it. It's just a turn-off for me, like the idea of Thalidomide babies.St0n3hengehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08504412781917592790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-37266125136538293932012-06-15T13:38:24.766-04:002012-06-15T13:38:24.766-04:00I had the same thought Adam did - a synopsis is su...I had the same thought Adam did - a synopsis is supposed to tell you everything, and it looks like the ending is missing.A. M. Perkinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08680290781463023921noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-62366436612159571962012-06-15T13:15:59.541-04:002012-06-15T13:15:59.541-04:00Obviously they're after our seat on the Securi...Obviously they're after our seat on the Security Council. From there they intend vetoing the rest of the world into submission.<br /><br />How do you get back stolen DNA? Going after it just gives the villains more opportunities to steal it. I just don't think it's possible ever to be sure nobody has got your DNA in a little vial somewhere. We shed the stuff everywhere we go.nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-81047786778129989952012-06-15T00:35:27.411-04:002012-06-15T00:35:27.411-04:00I know that Aristar (and I do like this name, but ...I know that Aristar (and I do like this name, but in my head I hear Alistair whenever I read it -- more my own musings than a problem with the name) has this mission to take control of Parliament; however, I agree with EE, what's next once they have this control of them? Could the stakes not be bigger, that Aristar would possibly seed their Anomalies into Parliament <i>and</i> other governments/leaders around the world -- if world domination is what they seek?Xiexiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02265895952183646895noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-78957849859490599832012-06-14T22:45:22.693-04:002012-06-14T22:45:22.693-04:00I've got to admit that I don't like the co...I've got to admit that I don't like the company name Machiavellian Anomalies, much as I love the word Machiavellian. It's like they're screaming, "We're scheming villains!" On the other hand, Aristar Industries was cool.Rachel6https://www.blogger.com/profile/15138745237488029817noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-33299845452970699862012-06-14T22:36:56.166-04:002012-06-14T22:36:56.166-04:00I like the ideas here, but I have to agree with EE...I like the ideas here, but I have to agree with EE on the lack of motivations for anybody. And the final sentence is pure telling. I'd cut the whole thing.<br /><br />Aren't synopses supposed to take you all the way to the end of the story? This ends like a query.Adam Heinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02225813532455467868noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-19223077964271928582012-06-14T19:18:42.343-04:002012-06-14T19:18:42.343-04:00Cut the first paragraph. You can save the science ...Cut the first paragraph. You can save the science details for the book. <br /><br />On the eve of Maya's birthday (you've mentioned she's almost 16) they meet Lorcan, sexy rocker of a teen rock band. When Maya's showered with spilled beer, she vanishes. <br /><br />As Maya learns to control her new teleportation abilities, Aristar Industries conspire to steal her DNA, using Lorcan and his bandmates. They retrieve her toothbrush and skiddle daddle to Germany where they will use it . . . <br /><br />I think you can tighten this a bit.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-71973102759612508342012-06-14T18:41:26.497-04:002012-06-14T18:41:26.497-04:00And if the British Houses of Parliament are taken ...<i>And if the British Houses of Parliament are taken down . . . What?</i><br /><br />Dancing in the streets!nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-68490227096962826722012-06-14T17:31:08.961-04:002012-06-14T17:31:08.961-04:00Okay, I guess I been in the pub.
"just lease ...Okay, I guess I been in the pub.<br />"just <b>lease</b> a pub"Mister Furkleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07156977719916770984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-80944588466437836882012-06-14T15:02:37.396-04:002012-06-14T15:02:37.396-04:00If Parliament is anything like Congress, just leas...If Parliament is anything like Congress, just least a pub across the street and offer free drinks.Mister Furkleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07156977719916770984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-43556014996840415522012-06-14T14:28:49.177-04:002012-06-14T14:28:49.177-04:00Lead poisoning? Like Superman, or like Scarface?
...Lead poisoning? Like Superman, or like Scarface?<br /><br />Technically, all you have to do to bring down Parliament is have the Queen order it shut down, isn't it? Failing that, resetting the thermostat would probably suffice.khazar-khumnoreply@blogger.com