tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post4708933837497323840..comments2024-03-26T18:28:06.391-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: Synopsis 26Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-9740605697040790772010-10-26T17:11:59.669-04:002010-10-26T17:11:59.669-04:00Abby gate-crashes Emerson Academy's annual Hal...Abby gate-crashes Emerson Academy's annual Halloween ball, [Didn't you say a spell had made her blind? Why would... Wait, I get it; she's blind, so she crashes into the gate.] <br /><br />Oh har dee har, EE. <br /><br />Is there some reason being blind means you can't be the kind of jerk that shows up to parties uninvited? I am confused.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-15089102446845908832010-10-22T11:56:37.658-04:002010-10-22T11:56:37.658-04:00I think "Blinded" was meant in the sense...I think "Blinded" was meant in the sense that her power was blinded. <br /><br />Otherwise too much doesn't make sense. She describes too much. Remember the GTP? It started with an excerpt, and she says "windowless room." What would that matter if she was blind?<br /><br />Of course I could be wrong, but then I would like to let the author know that the query and synopsis totally don't leave me with the feeling of a blind MC.<br /><br />Sorry if I'm being unclear... typing quickly 'cuz I gotta run :).<br /><br />Peace out Minions!JBnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-18482108385863169582010-10-21T21:30:13.141-04:002010-10-21T21:30:13.141-04:00Of 1273, Wikipedia sez:
"December 6 – Thomas...<i>Of 1273, Wikipedia sez:<br /><br />"December 6 – Thomas Aquinas quits his writing of Summa Theologica — a master work of Catholic theology — leaving it unfinished after having a mystical experience during Mass."</i><br /><br />Is this the mysterious Thomas? If so, don't make us guess.jmkmcmullenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04583164724632078131noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-39661521140375776552010-10-21T16:48:59.315-04:002010-10-21T16:48:59.315-04:00I'm confused.
But there is one nice side to r...I'm confused.<br /><br />But there is one nice side to researching queries and synopses--it doesn't get boring._*rachel*_https://www.blogger.com/profile/03293167107180931700noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-60497625187014394252010-10-21T16:26:24.061-04:002010-10-21T16:26:24.061-04:00So, is this a case where Thomas was Abby's lov...So, is this a case where Thomas was Abby's lover centuries ago BECAUSE events force her to travel back in time? Or is there some other incarnation of Abby running around being Thomas's lover while she's in the past with him? (like Inu Yasha torn between Kagomi and Kikyo?) I'm a little confused whether this story involves re-incarnation, or whether the comment about their century-old romance is a reference to her time-travel, which Thomas remembers but she doesn't, because it hasn't happened for her yet.Chicorynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-89227709621890408532010-10-21T16:14:58.684-04:002010-10-21T16:14:58.684-04:00Does the gate-crashing matter? It sounds as if the...Does the gate-crashing matter? It sounds as if the story starts when she's abducted. <br />I like the blindness aspect - way to up the odds against your heroine! - but that makes it a bit odd when Thomas is identified as dark-haired. Maybe something about his voice or his nature? Also, I didn't get that he was a vampire until you say that he's pre-vampire in the 1200s.batgirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15143310557906978680noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-879281434357690372010-10-21T15:29:16.441-04:002010-10-21T15:29:16.441-04:00Books where characters have a disability, yes.
Bu...Books where characters have a disability, yes.<br /><br />But please, no more books where:<br /><br />1. The character's disability has no impact whatsoever on his/her life.<br /><br />2. The character's disability is actually a super-power. (Eg she sees so much *more* than other people.)<br /><br />3. The character is miraculously cured of the disability at the end, as a reward.<br /><br />I've seen far too many of all three.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-88313819893679659132010-10-21T15:24:09.500-04:002010-10-21T15:24:09.500-04:00I am going to say something harsh and hope that th...I am going to say something harsh and hope that the writer is ready to hear it.<br /><br />You need to work on your writing. It isn't good enough yet.<br /><br />(I know that's hard to hear, but if someone hadn't said it to me ten years ago, I wouldn't now be multi-published scum.)<br /><br />Take a class if that's how you learn. Join a critique group. Read books about writing. Develop a critical eye toward your own writing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-61271527408290719762010-10-21T14:52:04.356-04:002010-10-21T14:52:04.356-04:00I didn't find the synopsis all that bad. (Oka...I didn't find the synopsis all that bad. (Okay, sure, some rewriting is necessary as EE pointed out, but I understood the story from the synopsis.) <br /><br />OK I had a few problems. Why did she crash the party? <br /><br />And I bet she immediately regretted being party crasher when she was abducted. No "almost" about it. <br /><br />Thomas helped her escape.<br /><br />"Abby also finds out that she and Thomas are supposedly [were once] lovers, though she is determined to fight it." Fight what? <br /><br />Linley should be identified as something other than a relative. I am assuming she is a witch. So Linley, her second cousin twice removed and also a witch transports her back in time to (what and why?) Learn the truth? because Linley just randomly causes problems for people?<br /><br />There are other motivation problems here and things are not as clear as they should be. But, I understand you are limited to a few hundred words. <br /><br />However, I think you need to tell us about mom. Mom sounds like a villian.<br /><br />I like the idea your MC is blind. We need more books where the MC has a disability - other than being orphaned with low self-esteem.vkwnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-8546465868322943302010-10-21T13:42:46.635-04:002010-10-21T13:42:46.635-04:00Author, read read read read. Read works in your ge...Author, read read read read. Read works in your genre. Read works outside your genre. Read books on writing. Keep writing, but think of it as practice. Join a writing group and listen to the critiques.<br /><br />This writing is not yet ready for prime time. Nothing wrong with that as long as you can see why and learn from it. Keep writing!Not Normally Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com