tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post4539865841248633758..comments2024-03-26T18:28:06.391-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: Face-Lift 1361Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1636548535059464592017-08-07T05:54:38.387-04:002017-08-07T05:54:38.387-04:00Hey, whatever happened to the strange, angelic man...Hey, whatever happened to the strange, angelic man?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-6046233534167808702017-08-05T16:38:48.474-04:002017-08-05T16:38:48.474-04:00Well, first off, after reading a 200000 word novel...Well, first off, after reading a 200000 word novel, most YA readers will have come of age themselves to be New Adult readers. <br /><br />Aside from that, I think agents want comparisons of manuscripts to know where it fits in the genre. So, comparisons should not be of the sort here. It is like Twilight, or Veronica Mars, or Charmed--not a blend. OP, just pick one or two that are similar. Your query is not supposed to be like movie hype but a business letter which describe you story in 250 words or less. <br /><br />Revise and try again.<br /><br />And, I am not an agent or editor, so others may disagree. Mister Furkleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07156977719916770984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-19118898889317593272017-08-05T13:57:24.404-04:002017-08-05T13:57:24.404-04:00"First Shadows is a YA Legal/Transgressive Th..."First Shadows is a YA Legal/Transgressive Thriller that is complete at 200,000 [85,000] words. It is a coming of age novel that is a delicious blend of Veronica Mars meets [and] Twilight with a dash of Charmed.<br /><br />The foundation of this book is factual." <br /><br />Maybe I'm nuts but this constant comparison to pubbed books is driving me nuts. Like comparing Seattle Slew to Secretariat. <br /><br />Evil, is it me or or the submitter folks getting lazy? <br />My book is like a chocolate cake a with smash of vanilla and some Rocky Road ice cream on the side. Maybe that is what the author thinks but it may not be the truth or what the agent is interested in - a smoothie of sorts.<br /><br />Get real guys, why is your ms special - comparisons not allowed - IMHO. Make it distinct (the query) which will no doubt flop (in this case) like the ms.As tis one <br /><br />Sorry, this is just annoying, no blood, sweat or tears here. I'd sure pass. No passion or truth or voice. Sorry author, I do not like being mean - but this just doesn't have any hunger or intrigue for me to even glance at. <br /><br />Apologize - if this your best, you better get better. <br /><br />Read the thousands of queries and comments here then ask if an agent would really etc.<br /><br />Sorry, Wilkins MacQueenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09932779108429504166noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-53597552510110027022017-08-01T11:53:51.403-04:002017-08-01T11:53:51.403-04:00Hi. I googled your book because was interested in ...Hi. I googled your book because was interested in the factual foundation, and found book reviews. Does the story you are querying now still include shapeshifters and paranormal elements? From this version, the agent would have no idea about the werewolves and magic mentioned in the reviews. If these have been removed, you might want to take down the earlier versions out there online.<br /><br />This also made me wonder if your book is already published or self-published? In either case, you should mention this in the letter, because this would affect the agent's selling strategy enough that they need to know up front. The usual advice I have seen is to include the sales figures so far, as well as mentioning how substantive your changes are if this is a revised version.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-58721272805157598552017-07-31T17:05:37.847-04:002017-07-31T17:05:37.847-04:00When your book is long enough to be 2 books and yo...When your book is long enough to be 2 books and you describe two different plot lines without saying if/how they're related, I wonder if you have a plot and if it makes sense or if there's just a bunch of stuff that randomly happens to characters.<br /><br />It would be more useful to say what type of facts the book is based on and what those facts are than to say the foundation is factual. Is it based on historic events? If so, what? etc.<br /><br />Pick ONE MC<br />Tell us what your MC's (or the story's) goal is<br />Tell us what obstacles are encountered in achieving this goal<br />Wrap it up in a way that makes the story sound interesting<br />Try to keep it < 1 page (this is a bit long)<br /><br />Good LuckAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-14852589071033905332017-07-31T10:41:17.157-04:002017-07-31T10:41:17.157-04:00Didn't know "legal/transgressive thriller...Didn't know "legal/transgressive thriller" was a genre.jcwriteshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14325020251566064859noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-6087904089302156652017-07-31T09:48:41.223-04:002017-07-31T09:48:41.223-04:00Rhetorical questions: But is it enough? Is it too ...Rhetorical questions: But is it enough? Is it too late? Who can she trust? Can she even trust herself? Or will she lose her family and her life? <br /><br />In a 250 word query, you should ask no rhetorical questions. If you insist, then just one at the end. You are not writing movie log lines.<br /><br />The problem with rhetorical questions is that they turn control over to the reader to speculate and that takes them straight out of the query. Rhetorical questions only work when the questioner can keep control as in a movie trailer. Mister Furkleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07156977719916770984noreply@blogger.com