tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post115870514481711492..comments2024-03-18T13:32:44.865-04:00Comments on Evil Editor: Face-Lift 192Evil Editorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879826770199639420noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158972379641729782006-09-22T20:46:00.000-04:002006-09-22T20:46:00.000-04:00This is a minor point compared with the repellent ...This is a minor point compared with the repellent premise, but I would never anything about a man who called his ex-wife "the belle bitch."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158884075328224422006-09-21T20:14:00.000-04:002006-09-21T20:14:00.000-04:00Almodovar made a movie about priests molesting you...<I>Almodovar made a movie about priests molesting young boys, and it turned out to be about truth, lies, and the nature of fiction and art -- and it was unbelievably good. </I><BR/><BR/> but I am pretty sure it wasn't a romance.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158870450619587832006-09-21T16:27:00.000-04:002006-09-21T16:27:00.000-04:00Anonymous in the UK - Remember how the British too...Anonymous in the UK - Remember how the British took over the world? In the days that THEY were the biggest prudes? And now they own... nothing? Yeah.<BR/><BR/>"You know what I blame this on the decline of? Society."HawkOwlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08506953701159624542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158869222351075772006-09-21T16:07:00.000-04:002006-09-21T16:07:00.000-04:00EE said: "John Grisham writing romance? Don't make...EE said: "John Grisham writing romance? Don't make me laugh. That's about as believable as Nora Roberts writing a mystery."<BR/><BR/>Ahem, Nora Roberts writes a police procedural series set in the future under the name JD Robb.<BR/><BR/>As for the premise of this novel: Yuck. No matter how many times you say the protag is truly in love with the girl, he still comes across as a dirty old man with bad taste in underwear. The thing is, "mature" 17-year-olds aren't that mature, and a 30-plus guy who'd be interested in a teenage girl has a screw loose somewhere. <BR/><BR/>I think this story would work much better if it were written from another character's point of view, such as the mother of the girl, the cop on the case, even the "belle bitch" ex-wife.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158847405198069822006-09-21T10:03:00.000-04:002006-09-21T10:03:00.000-04:00In the U.K. the age of consent is 16. Alix could b...In the U.K. the age of consent is 16. Alix could be 50 for all I care, and I wouldn't think falling in love with a 17 year old was inappropriate.<BR/><BR/>Yup, Americans are just prudes.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158824524156448022006-09-21T03:42:00.000-04:002006-09-21T03:42:00.000-04:00Dixie, if you make it obvious in the query that Al...Dixie, if you make it obvious in the query that Alix is of Greek origin, you might not get all this stuff about the names.<BR/><BR/>In the U.K. the age of consent is 16. Alix could be 50 for all I care, and I wouldn't think falling in love with a 17 year old was inappropriate. I question the power relations between the two characters (in the first chapter on the Crapometer), which in my view does make it a little odd.<BR/><BR/>The lacy boxers made this look like a scandal book.Nikkihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05987196833492236832noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158785676799179142006-09-20T16:54:00.000-04:002006-09-20T16:54:00.000-04:00Thanks for the link, novelust. That is indeed wha...Thanks for the link, novelust. That is indeed what I remembered seeing (and only a couple of months ago - how time lapses).<BR/><BR/>Every explanation by the author (both on the crapometer and here) only highlights plot and character problems I've already begun to suspect. <BR/><BR/>If so much past-and-future plot has to be explained in an effort to convince readers it's a good story and worth keeping on with, it's a sure clue that the author is not getting across to readers with the text itself. <BR/><BR/>That's rather like viewing some modern art; without the accompanying explanation, it's only splashes of colour on a page. And, frankly, some of those 'colour combinations' - character traits as revealed here - are just plain ugly. They're driving readers/viewers away instead of contributing to the 'romantic' mood or, in this opening, the drama and suspense of the courtroom scene.<BR/><BR/>If Alix (and yes, the majority of readers will continue to trip over the 'girly' spelling whether it's culturally accurate or not) is not to come across as a tacky, spoiled lecher who deserves to be skint by his trashy ex-wife (instead of as a hopeless romantic who rescued the half-sister she heartlessly abandoned to a foster home) you need a new place to start and a personality makeover for Our Hero.<BR/><BR/>Please, author, don't TELL ME more details that may make this opening seem interesting 200 pages from now. SHOW ME an opening scene, and a query letter, that will make me care enough for a major character to sit through his initial appearance and want to read on.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158780453854927132006-09-20T15:27:00.000-04:002006-09-20T15:27:00.000-04:00You don't really need sympathetic characters in li...You don't really need sympathetic characters in literary fiction--examples too numerous to bother with--but in genre fiction you really do need the "good guy" or at least if they aren't good guys at the start they need to be by the end after the comeuppance. If that happens to Alix we need to hear about it in the query.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158778806417843332006-09-20T15:00:00.000-04:002006-09-20T15:00:00.000-04:00I'm sure if I understood the query, I'd object to ...I'm sure if I understood the query, I'd object to it. As it was, I found it too wordy and hard to follow. I'm just a simple Zombie Deathfish, but I can't see the appeal in either character. Alix (shudder) is either an old lech or a young one. Rachel is a smirking strumpet who's happy to sleep with her sister's husband. Who do I sympathise with here?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158773379351811782006-09-20T13:29:00.000-04:002006-09-20T13:29:00.000-04:00I think the take-away message for the author from ...I think the take-away message for the author from this discussion should be that, no matter how much you think the relationship is loving and justified in the story, the response from the vast majority of readers is still: "Older guy does teenage girl? In lacy boxers? Ick, no thanks." And, even if it is legal and she is "mature" for her age, 17 is too young for me at least to believe there is a real, non-skanky relationship here.Daisy Batemanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10031425541717458261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158773325129274092006-09-20T13:28:00.000-04:002006-09-20T13:28:00.000-04:00It wasn't on Miss Snark's Crapometer, but the firs...It wasn't on Miss Snark's Crapometer, but the first chapter did appear on Elektra's.<BR/><BR/>http://crapometer.blogspot.com/2006/06/chapter-one.html<BR/><BR/>I don't much mind unsympathetic characters, but I require them to at least be somewhat cool/threatening/funny. The query doesn't make me think he's worth reading about.Novelusthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07446059248591407659noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158770427422888102006-09-20T12:40:00.000-04:002006-09-20T12:40:00.000-04:00I could have sworn it was going to be plot #3.I could have sworn it was going to be plot #3.Reihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17005292189176596201noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158766397208156342006-09-20T11:33:00.000-04:002006-09-20T11:33:00.000-04:00I totally agree with EE on the title. I thought it...I totally agree with EE on the title. I thought it had to be non-fiction. And the first sentence is the opposite of a hook: it's meaningless and trite.<BR/><BR/>The plot sounds really dull, especially if he <EM>didn't</EM> in fact have really kinky sex with a minor and arrange for her disappearance. And even if he did, I'd make her less than 17. 17 is plenty old enough to be a total pervert of one's own free will. 14, now that would be disturbing.<BR/><BR/>Last but not least, I've never met anyone named Alix who was male. It would be more novel if Alix was female anyway.HawkOwlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08506953701159624542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158763438358115822006-09-20T10:43:00.000-04:002006-09-20T10:43:00.000-04:00There are a lot of negative responses about the pl...There are a lot of negative responses about the plot, but the plot doesn't bother me so much. Almodovar made a movie about priests molesting young boys, and it turned out to be about truth, lies, and the nature of fiction and art -- and it was unbelievably good. So a 30ish man and a 17-year-old soulmate don't freak me out.<BR/>My problem is simply that I found the query hard to follow. Confusing sentences, incomplete explanations (where is Rachel, anyway?). What is the book really about? The legal system? A love story? A kidnapping/mystery? If you rewrite the query to get to the heart of the book, maybe the "ick" factor of the plot won't be an issue.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158759376110529512006-09-20T09:36:00.000-04:002006-09-20T09:36:00.000-04:00Oh, I see, the nick radicalfeministpoet is meant t...Oh, I see, the nick radicalfeministpoet is meant to be ironic. Sorry about being a bit slow on the uptake there!<BR/><BR/>EE, you're getting so famous you've attracted astroturf.nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158757092287867152006-09-20T08:58:00.000-04:002006-09-20T08:58:00.000-04:00I agree with EE that the title's got to go and you...I agree with EE that the title's got to go and you definitely shouldn't abbreviate it in the query you send out.<BR/><BR/>Other than that, you couldn't force me to read this even if you had pictures of me in lacy boxers. ;-)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158752388638344882006-09-20T07:39:00.000-04:002006-09-20T07:39:00.000-04:00What is this, some kind of contest to see if the m...What is this, some kind of contest to see if the minions can be induced to dislike the author even more than his creation?<BR/><BR/>Every excuse that's put forward for Alix is more contemptible than the last, and seventeen isn't even underage where I come from.<BR/><BR/>(A crush, EE? Surely not--crushes don't last!)nonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00415222406280230021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158750808504774382006-09-20T07:13:00.000-04:002006-09-20T07:13:00.000-04:00Lacey boxer shorts? Huh? Why is he wearing lacey...Lacey boxer shorts? Huh? Why is he wearing lacey boxer shorts? I guess that's funny in the manuscript, but still. Huh?<BR/><BR/><BR/>"Rachel, his soon-to-be ex-wife's 17-year-old half sister" Huh?Cathy Writes Romancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07098475617400811888noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158748440372738302006-09-20T06:34:00.000-04:002006-09-20T06:34:00.000-04:00I don't like the guy, who is cheating on his wife ...I don't like the guy, who is cheating on his wife with her sister (half-sister is still sister). And the sister is just 17. (Hear Beatles playing in the background.)<BR/><BR/>And I don't like the missing 17 year old much. Unless she's mentally slow, she knows how to say no, especially to e-mail.<BR/><BR/>And I have no sympathy for your take that this law is unjust. The MMC needs to keep it zipped until he finds a suitable woman, nearer his age.<BR/><BR/>And the fact that he has loads of money makes him less sympathetic, because I don't (have loads of money). A billionaire can buy a lot of private investigation to find the girl if she'll help his defense. He can buy a great legal defense (Lawyer and all) and get off from the criminal charges. End of story.<BR/><BR/>Unless the girl is missing because he's truly evil and has done her in. Then I want the story from the detective's POV.<BR/><BR/>Not something I'm interested in.<BR/><BR/><BR/>EE, yes, we'd be sending you so much e-mail, you'd have to change your address to "hot male."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158744937922471822006-09-20T05:35:00.000-04:002006-09-20T05:35:00.000-04:00I agree with flyinghoti. YUCK on the "answering th...I agree with flyinghoti. YUCK on the "answering the door..." bit. Lacy boxers? He's about to be alone with his young soul mate for the first time after sending lots of emails, I guess, and he can't even be bothered to wear some clothes for her?<BR/><BR/>Not to mention, if he was married to her older sister, chances are he's known this girl since she was about 15 at the oldest. Which just makes it more yuck.<BR/><BR/>If we had a sense that the age difference bothered him too but there's this soul mae thing, that would help redeem it, but I can't help but agree with acd. Maybe it would be nice of him to wait a couple of years before seducing the seventeen-year-old-girl. The query makes him just sound like he's totally focused on the sex--there's no romance in it at all.Staciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07969399927758009095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158737874223228842006-09-20T03:37:00.000-04:002006-09-20T03:37:00.000-04:00If you could commit sexual acts by email, Evil Edi...<I>If you could commit sexual acts by email, Evil Editor's mailbox would be overflowing.</I><BR/><BR/>The old ways are best: committing sexual acts by fax.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158733214641169362006-09-20T02:20:00.000-04:002006-09-20T02:20:00.000-04:00All I can say to the lacy boxers, hard on etc is y...All I can say to the lacy boxers, hard on etc is yuck yuck yuck.<BR/>The minions are right.<BR/>Any redeeming factors fade into nothing in the light of that one scene. The only people who would like this story are old lechers.<BR/>As the mother of a beautiful and sweet seventeen year old girl I feel totally repulsed, and nothing but loathing for Alix.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158726804761952942006-09-20T00:33:00.000-04:002006-09-20T00:33:00.000-04:00[If you could commit sexual acts by email, Evil Ed...[If you could commit sexual acts by email, Evil Editor's mailbox would be overflowing.] [Right, minions?]<BR/><BR/>Aw gee, aren't my messages getting through to you EE?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158725195660583892006-09-20T00:06:00.000-04:002006-09-20T00:06:00.000-04:00{{["If you could commit sexual acts by email, Evil...{{["If you could commit sexual acts by email, Evil Editor's mailbox would be overflowing.]"}}<BR/><BR/>Please don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not that kind of boy!Dave Fragmentshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17985158361431606939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26791026.post-1158724391242884052006-09-19T23:53:00.000-04:002006-09-19T23:53:00.000-04:00Ouch! Sounds like the only crime in hitting "send...Ouch! Sounds like the only crime in hitting "send" this time was sending it to Evil Editor.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com